We already used to do something like this but... courtesy of college humor:
-Drink everytime somebody uses the following phrases
--"throwing down life lessons"
--"what's up, bitches?"
--"pop that shirt off"
--"you want 'x' to pop" (ie "you want your muscles to pop," "this will make your eyes pop")
-Drink anytime the Gang mocks one another with a display of fake crying.
-Drink anytime someone in the Gang points something out as racist.
-Drink anytime someone is drinking on the show. 2x drink if it's a member of the gang.
-Drink anytime Dee is referred to as "Sweet Dee" by one of the Gang.
-Drink for any demeaning reference to Sweet Dee as old, ugly, untalented, or any combination thereof.
-Drinkfor any reference to Sweet Dee's backbrace.
--2x drink if they refer toher as a monster or "Aluminum Monster."
--3x drink if the back brace actually appears.
-Drinks for anytime Sweet Dee refers to the gang as "boners."
-Drink for any evidence of Charlie's illiteracy, or references to it by the Gang.
-Drinkanytime Frank brandishes a gun, or anyone brandishes a weapon.
--2xdrinks for characters other than Frank brandishing a gun.
-Drink anytime Frank wants "in on this action."
-Drinkanytime somebody is shown on drugs, or any reference to past drug use(including Charlie sniffing glue).
--2x drinks if they are shown taking the drugs or sniffing glue.
-Drink for any instance of a homoerotic massage.
-Drink anytime Charlie appears in long Johns.
-Drink for any appearance of the Waitress.
--2x drinks if the Gang actually calls her "waitress."
-drink for any appearance of the McPoyles or Rickety Cricket.
-Drink anytime someone in the Gang punctuates a point with "Boom!" or "Bam!"
-Drink anytime something is set on fire. 2x if it is a person or other living thing.
Following these guidelines, you should be fucked up or dead by the end of any episode.
Showing posts with label Television. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Television. Show all posts
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Monday, June 29, 2009
When the Fuck did CBS become funny?
On Mondays anyways.
I started watching the show How I Met Your Mother when I saw Jason Segal, so I was intrigued. The show is very funny and there is a lot of people in it, including Neil Patrick Harris, Alyson Hannigan, Will Sasso, and the voice of Bob Sagat. Oh, and in the episode I saw, Jason Segal made a lightsaber reference...then proceeded to cut a turkey with a "real" one during the credits. Gold.
Then, a show staring Patrick Warburton (Putty from Seinfeld and the voice of Brock Samson), called Rules of Engagement came on. Surprisingly hilarious. Episode about being a homophobe. Lots of dick jokes. Surprising for CBS. I enjoyed it. Also, one of the girls on the show is fucking gorgeous. Oh, and David Spade is also in the cast
Watched an episode of Two and a Half Men. Lots of dick and masturbation jokes. Again, surprising for CBS.
I have seen some episodes of the Big Bang Theory, which is on now, and it is pretty good. Some of the characters suck so much I almost hate it, but overall its pretty funny. The blonde chick is super hot. Mmmmmmm
Maybe I'll try to get into CBS Mondays. Never thought I'd say that.
I started watching the show How I Met Your Mother when I saw Jason Segal, so I was intrigued. The show is very funny and there is a lot of people in it, including Neil Patrick Harris, Alyson Hannigan, Will Sasso, and the voice of Bob Sagat. Oh, and in the episode I saw, Jason Segal made a lightsaber reference...then proceeded to cut a turkey with a "real" one during the credits. Gold.
Then, a show staring Patrick Warburton (Putty from Seinfeld and the voice of Brock Samson), called Rules of Engagement came on. Surprisingly hilarious. Episode about being a homophobe. Lots of dick jokes. Surprising for CBS. I enjoyed it. Also, one of the girls on the show is fucking gorgeous. Oh, and David Spade is also in the cast
Watched an episode of Two and a Half Men. Lots of dick and masturbation jokes. Again, surprising for CBS.
I have seen some episodes of the Big Bang Theory, which is on now, and it is pretty good. Some of the characters suck so much I almost hate it, but overall its pretty funny. The blonde chick is super hot. Mmmmmmm
Maybe I'll try to get into CBS Mondays. Never thought I'd say that.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Scrubs Finale
I don't know if you all watched this a while back but this has always been one of my favorite shows. This ending is just so fitting!
Monday, May 4, 2009
Community
A new comedy about community college starring Joel McHale, Chevy Chase, John Oliver (is that his name?). This sounds very promising. Look for it in the fall on NBC.
Oh, and Heroes will be back for season 4. Let's hear it for good storytelling!
Oh, and Heroes will be back for season 4. Let's hear it for good storytelling!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Yay! A Heroes Post!
Just for you, Claudio
While I totally agree with you, they really need their original writers back (season 1), I actually enjoyed this episode (Monday 4/6/09). There was a lot of drama. There was a lot of progression. There was a lot of bullshit.
I knew from the first 5 minutes that Bennett knew that Sylar wasn't dead. I knew he was too smart for that. I mean, he's been doing that shit for 20 some years, of course he'd be too smart for that. But it was interesting to see him go off the deep end and almost end his marriage because Sylar was driving him insane. I hate Sandra Bennett. She is one of the worst characters on the show, but I don't want to see HRG kill his wife to "stop" Sylar. I'm glad he was able to figure out it was his wife he held a gun to, and that he still loves her dearly. I hope he's able to get some retribution. Especially after what Sylar and Danko did to him around those agents.
Parkman's storyline was rather interesting too. I like that he completely tourmented Danko and broke up his relationship...with a prostitute?! Well, I guess if you're Danko, that's the best you can do. But it's good to see that Danko can get fucked over too in this debacle. The only thing I really have a problem with is that Matt doesn't use his powers to the fullest. He puts himself in situations that he can easily get out of, but he just gives up. I want him to use his fucking powers.
Baby Touch and Go. God dammit! All of that was horrible. A Japanese guy with a Texas accent? Ando making a face to get the kid to start the car? What, are we 8 years old? Fucking Christ! I'm glad Hiro saved Matt and reunited him with his son, but I could have done without the rest of it. I need Hiro to use his powers again (mostly go back to his late season 1, season 2 self).
I'm excited to see what next week holds. What do all the skeletons mean? Will Peter get his fucking powers back anytime soon? Will Hiro? Will the season get any better? Will I get a superpower? No, ok, I'll just take a better season. Bring on the next episode!
While I totally agree with you, they really need their original writers back (season 1), I actually enjoyed this episode (Monday 4/6/09). There was a lot of drama. There was a lot of progression. There was a lot of bullshit.
I knew from the first 5 minutes that Bennett knew that Sylar wasn't dead. I knew he was too smart for that. I mean, he's been doing that shit for 20 some years, of course he'd be too smart for that. But it was interesting to see him go off the deep end and almost end his marriage because Sylar was driving him insane. I hate Sandra Bennett. She is one of the worst characters on the show, but I don't want to see HRG kill his wife to "stop" Sylar. I'm glad he was able to figure out it was his wife he held a gun to, and that he still loves her dearly. I hope he's able to get some retribution. Especially after what Sylar and Danko did to him around those agents.
Parkman's storyline was rather interesting too. I like that he completely tourmented Danko and broke up his relationship...with a prostitute?! Well, I guess if you're Danko, that's the best you can do. But it's good to see that Danko can get fucked over too in this debacle. The only thing I really have a problem with is that Matt doesn't use his powers to the fullest. He puts himself in situations that he can easily get out of, but he just gives up. I want him to use his fucking powers.
Baby Touch and Go. God dammit! All of that was horrible. A Japanese guy with a Texas accent? Ando making a face to get the kid to start the car? What, are we 8 years old? Fucking Christ! I'm glad Hiro saved Matt and reunited him with his son, but I could have done without the rest of it. I need Hiro to use his powers again (mostly go back to his late season 1, season 2 self).
I'm excited to see what next week holds. What do all the skeletons mean? Will Peter get his fucking powers back anytime soon? Will Hiro? Will the season get any better? Will I get a superpower? No, ok, I'll just take a better season. Bring on the next episode!
Monday, March 30, 2009
Best of Homer Simpson (Part 3)
The final installment of quotes specifically dedicated to Homer Simpson. The next installment(s) will include the hilarious quotes of the interaction between Homer & Marge.
Homer: "Got any of that beer that has candy floating in it? You know, Skittlebrau?"
Apu: "Such a beer does not exist, sir. I think you must have dreamt it."
Homer: "Oh. Well, then just give me a six-pack and a couple bags of Skittles."
"So I says, blue M&M, red M&M, they all wind up the same color in the end."
"Homer no function beer well without."
"What's the point of going out? We're just going to wind up back here anyway."
"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose, but how drunk you get."
"Oh boy, buffalo testicles!"
"Operator, give me the number for 911!"
Homer: "Okay, don't panic. To find Flanders, you just have to think like Flanders."
Homer's brain: "I'm a big four-eyed lame-o and I wear the same stupid sweater everyday and..."
Homer: "The Springfield River!"
"So what you're saying Marge, is that we're definitely going to win tomorrow! Woo-hoo! Well I won't be needing this anymore. (tries to flush a stolen Oscar statue down the toilet, it makes a gurgling sound) Marge, someone broke the toilet."
Homer: "Got any of that beer that has candy floating in it? You know, Skittlebrau?"
Apu: "Such a beer does not exist, sir. I think you must have dreamt it."
Homer: "Oh. Well, then just give me a six-pack and a couple bags of Skittles."
"So I says, blue M&M, red M&M, they all wind up the same color in the end."
"Homer no function beer well without."
"What's the point of going out? We're just going to wind up back here anyway."
"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose, but how drunk you get."
"Oh boy, buffalo testicles!"
"Operator, give me the number for 911!"
Homer: "Okay, don't panic. To find Flanders, you just have to think like Flanders."
Homer's brain: "I'm a big four-eyed lame-o and I wear the same stupid sweater everyday and..."
Homer: "The Springfield River!"
"So what you're saying Marge, is that we're definitely going to win tomorrow! Woo-hoo! Well I won't be needing this anymore. (tries to flush a stolen Oscar statue down the toilet, it makes a gurgling sound) Marge, someone broke the toilet."
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Best of Homer Simpson (Part 2)
Here are more Homer Simpson quotes, as I said would be coming. Enjoy!
TV Announcer: "It's 11:00, do you know where your children are?"
Homer: "I told you last night, no! Where is Bart anyway? His dinner's getting all cold and eaten."
Belle: "Are you wearing a grocery bag?"
Homer: "I have misplaced my pants."
"Look at me! I'm Peter Pantless!"
Ray Patterson: "Sorry I'm late everyone. Somebody tampered with my brakes!"
Homer: "Well then you should have been early."
Retiring Food Critic: "Who are you and why are you ruining my retirement party?"
Homer; "I'll have you know I wandered off from the tour."
Lindsay Nagle: "Well, your recovery begins today and we promise to give you all the sugar cookies and secondhand smoke you can handle."
Homer: "These sugar cookies you speak of, are they real or symbolic?"
Lindsay: "They're on that table over there."
Homer: "Oh, I don't want to walk twelve steps...because anything that takes "twelve steps" isn't worth doing! Get it?! Twelve?! Steps?! (wakes up outside) Hey, how'd I get here?"
"Your Honor, I would like to represent myself. Drunken hicks of the jury..."
Carmen Electra: "My face is up here Homer."
Homer: (looking at her breasts) "I've made my choice."
Homer: "Oh..my..God!"
Lisa: "What is it?"
Homer: "Trammampoline! Trambopoline!"
TV Announcer: "It's 11:00, do you know where your children are?"
Homer: "I told you last night, no! Where is Bart anyway? His dinner's getting all cold and eaten."
Belle: "Are you wearing a grocery bag?"
Homer: "I have misplaced my pants."
"Look at me! I'm Peter Pantless!"
Ray Patterson: "Sorry I'm late everyone. Somebody tampered with my brakes!"
Homer: "Well then you should have been early."
Retiring Food Critic: "Who are you and why are you ruining my retirement party?"
Homer; "I'll have you know I wandered off from the tour."
Lindsay Nagle: "Well, your recovery begins today and we promise to give you all the sugar cookies and secondhand smoke you can handle."
Homer: "These sugar cookies you speak of, are they real or symbolic?"
Lindsay: "They're on that table over there."
Homer: "Oh, I don't want to walk twelve steps...because anything that takes "twelve steps" isn't worth doing! Get it?! Twelve?! Steps?! (wakes up outside) Hey, how'd I get here?"
"Your Honor, I would like to represent myself. Drunken hicks of the jury..."
Carmen Electra: "My face is up here Homer."
Homer: (looking at her breasts) "I've made my choice."
Homer: "Oh..my..God!"
Lisa: "What is it?"
Homer: "Trammampoline! Trambopoline!"
Friday, March 27, 2009
Best of Homer Simpson (Part 1)
Hello fellow bloggers. Keeping with my Simpsons themed posts recently, I have collected a vast variety of quotes on a lot of Simpson characters. Over the course of the next week I will add these quotes as separate posts for your amusement. I have broken them up into the Simpson family, Homer, Bart, Bart & Lisa, Grampa, Moe, Krusty, Homer & Marge, Mr. Burns & Smithers, as well as many other characters. Where else would a Simpsons collection of quotes begin then with Homer?
"Kids, let me tell you about another so called "wicked guy." He had long hair and some wild ideas, and he didn't always do what other people thought was right. And that man's name was...I forget. But the point is...I forget that too. Marge, you know who I'm talking about. He used to drive that blue car."
Homer: "All right, everybody in the pool!"
Amish Farmer: "'Tis a fine barn, but sure 'tis no pool, English."
Homer: "D'oh-eth!"
"Oh I wish I wish I hadn't killed that fish."
Homer: "Wait a minute...there's something bothering me about this place."
(looks around, seemingly oblivious that he is in a lesbian bar)
Homer: "I know! This lesbian bar doesn't have a fire exit! Enjoy your death trap ladies!"
Woman: "What was her problem?"
(While watching Barney's film at the Springfield Film Festival)
Homer: "I'll never drink again."
Vendor: "I've got beer here!"
Homer: "I'll take ten."
"Lisa, honey, if you really want to preserve his memory, I recommend getting a tatoo. It preserves the things you love. (pulls up shirt sleeve) Starland Vocal Band?! They suck!"
"Don't let Krusty's death get you down boy. People die all the time. Just like that. Why you could wake up dead tomorrow....well, good night."
"If I could say a few words, I'd be a better public speaker."
Billy Corgan: "Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins"
Homer: "Homer Simpson, smiling politely"
"Sweet merciful crap! My car!"
More to come...
"Kids, let me tell you about another so called "wicked guy." He had long hair and some wild ideas, and he didn't always do what other people thought was right. And that man's name was...I forget. But the point is...I forget that too. Marge, you know who I'm talking about. He used to drive that blue car."
Homer: "All right, everybody in the pool!"
Amish Farmer: "'Tis a fine barn, but sure 'tis no pool, English."
Homer: "D'oh-eth!"
"Oh I wish I wish I hadn't killed that fish."
Homer: "Wait a minute...there's something bothering me about this place."
(looks around, seemingly oblivious that he is in a lesbian bar)
Homer: "I know! This lesbian bar doesn't have a fire exit! Enjoy your death trap ladies!"
Woman: "What was her problem?"
(While watching Barney's film at the Springfield Film Festival)
Homer: "I'll never drink again."
Vendor: "I've got beer here!"
Homer: "I'll take ten."
"Lisa, honey, if you really want to preserve his memory, I recommend getting a tatoo. It preserves the things you love. (pulls up shirt sleeve) Starland Vocal Band?! They suck!"
"Don't let Krusty's death get you down boy. People die all the time. Just like that. Why you could wake up dead tomorrow....well, good night."
"If I could say a few words, I'd be a better public speaker."
Billy Corgan: "Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins"
Homer: "Homer Simpson, smiling politely"
"Sweet merciful crap! My car!"
More to come...
Monday, March 23, 2009
Heroes is Backish!
It has been a long time since I've actually talked about Heroes. I'm going to give you a heads up in case you have not seen tonight's episode, I'm going to spoil the shit out of this episode. So, before you read this, watch the episode! It was actually a good episode among a bland season so far.
Now, I haven't seen the first 2 minutes or so, because I was still getting to my room, so I'm not really sure what happened to Sylar in Denko's apartment other than handing over the puppet master (whatever the hell his name is). Not sure why he was strung up. But, from then on, it was damn good.
I'm so glad Hiro finally got his fucking powers back! Except I had a problem with how he gets it back. He touched the kid? So what!? He talked about his mother before it happened, is that supposed to be his redemption? Where's the drama, where's the fight? I know Hiro was under an extreme sense of panic, which probably reignited his power, but it all felt...rushed. This is not the Hiro I want to love. But, with that said, I'm glad he has his powers back. Even if they are in a rudementary form (he's kind of where Peter is right now). I'm intrigued at the prospect that they now both have the journey to get their full powers back. Also, Ando is now a saiyan? Shooting electricity rockets? Sure, I'll buy it. I can't buy into the fact that he was so surprised that he could do that, even though he was preparing to do that. That makes no sense, but it was cool to see.
I like Angela Petrelli's character. She knows what has to be done and appearantly can escape from anyone. She's crafty. Oh, and she has a son that can fly (2 of them actually). I was glad to see Peter in this episode, but it was such a brief visit, I was kind of disappointed. Also, what's with the elevator shaft with no roof? Now that makes absolutely no sense. I'm still waiting for Peter to get his full power back...I know it's going to happen. He is way too underutilized at the moment.
It was almost too obvious that Micah is Rebel. I'm actually surprised at how resourseful he is. He's like the computer in Eagle Eye. I can see him being able to evade the agents for a long time, he seems to be honing his skill pretty well. Also, wow his voice got deep.
I'm still not a fan of Tracy Strauss (mostly because Ali Larter doesn't seem right for the part), but I am glad that she's using her powers more. That's exactly where I want to be. I want ice powers and have some serious control over them. Her freezing herself was kind of weird though. That wouldn't happen. I guess she did it to make it seem like she was dead, but it still irked me. She's still alive? What the fuck, T-1000?!
I wish Daphne was still alive. She's so hot.
I'm very surprised that they didn't have Claire in this episode. That's just insane. I thought the writers had a crush on her or something. Same thing with Nathan. Shocked.
I hope this episode was a glimpse of what we'll see in the 2nd half of the season. We deserve a good story. It's the only show about superheroes right now. It needs to up its game and FAST! I still have hope, and that's why I keep watching.
Damn I want ice powers...*dream*
Now, I haven't seen the first 2 minutes or so, because I was still getting to my room, so I'm not really sure what happened to Sylar in Denko's apartment other than handing over the puppet master (whatever the hell his name is). Not sure why he was strung up. But, from then on, it was damn good.
I'm so glad Hiro finally got his fucking powers back! Except I had a problem with how he gets it back. He touched the kid? So what!? He talked about his mother before it happened, is that supposed to be his redemption? Where's the drama, where's the fight? I know Hiro was under an extreme sense of panic, which probably reignited his power, but it all felt...rushed. This is not the Hiro I want to love. But, with that said, I'm glad he has his powers back. Even if they are in a rudementary form (he's kind of where Peter is right now). I'm intrigued at the prospect that they now both have the journey to get their full powers back. Also, Ando is now a saiyan? Shooting electricity rockets? Sure, I'll buy it. I can't buy into the fact that he was so surprised that he could do that, even though he was preparing to do that. That makes no sense, but it was cool to see.
I like Angela Petrelli's character. She knows what has to be done and appearantly can escape from anyone. She's crafty. Oh, and she has a son that can fly (2 of them actually). I was glad to see Peter in this episode, but it was such a brief visit, I was kind of disappointed. Also, what's with the elevator shaft with no roof? Now that makes absolutely no sense. I'm still waiting for Peter to get his full power back...I know it's going to happen. He is way too underutilized at the moment.
It was almost too obvious that Micah is Rebel. I'm actually surprised at how resourseful he is. He's like the computer in Eagle Eye. I can see him being able to evade the agents for a long time, he seems to be honing his skill pretty well. Also, wow his voice got deep.
I'm still not a fan of Tracy Strauss (mostly because Ali Larter doesn't seem right for the part), but I am glad that she's using her powers more. That's exactly where I want to be. I want ice powers and have some serious control over them. Her freezing herself was kind of weird though. That wouldn't happen. I guess she did it to make it seem like she was dead, but it still irked me. She's still alive? What the fuck, T-1000?!
I wish Daphne was still alive. She's so hot.
I'm very surprised that they didn't have Claire in this episode. That's just insane. I thought the writers had a crush on her or something. Same thing with Nathan. Shocked.
I hope this episode was a glimpse of what we'll see in the 2nd half of the season. We deserve a good story. It's the only show about superheroes right now. It needs to up its game and FAST! I still have hope, and that's why I keep watching.
Damn I want ice powers...*dream*
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 11)
This is the last season that is actually out on DVD so it may be a little harder to continue based upon the fact I would need to watch others on a computer. I will do my best to continue on with season 12. Does anyone know if it's scheduled for DVD release any time soon? I decided that I would do two quotes a piece for this season.
Number 5: "Pygmoelian" (Episode 242)
Moe gets plastic surgery to look more attractive and ends up staring on a soap opera.
Favorite quotes:
Lenny: "Moe, this liquor license expired in 1973, and it's only good in Rhode Island, and it's signed by you!"
Moe: "Yeah, I've been meaning to get that updated for this state and real."
"Duffman can't breathe! Oh no!"
Number 4: "Faith Off" (Episode 237)
Bart becomes a faith healer while Homer decides to build a float for the Springfield U vs. Springfield A&M football game.
Favorite quotes:
Homer: "I hate Springfield U so much!"
Lisa: "You went to Springfield U, you hate A&M."
Homer: "So much."
Todd: "Is he killing that guitar daddy?"
Flanders: "Yes son."
Number 3: "Brother's Little Helper" (Episode 228)
Bart takes a new drug called "Focusyn" and claims that Major League Baseball is spying on him.
Favorite quotes:
Principal Skinner: "Thank you for coming."
Homer: "Thank you for getting me out of work."
(Marge stands up to the tank that Bart is driving)
Homer: "My God is she brave, standing up to that freaked out junkie."
Lisa: "Dad, that junkie is your son!"
Homer: "Why don't you just tell everybody!"
Number 2: "Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder" (Episode 232)
Homer bowls a 300 game and is a star...for about a week.
Favorite quotes:
Carl: "Homer, what whacky name do you want?"
Homer: "Are Poo and Ass taken?"
(As Homer is drowning in the ocean)
Homer: "Maggie, call Aquaman!"
Number 1: "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner" (Episode 229)
Homer becomes a food critic and, while initially loving everything, starts giving bad reviews and makes a lot of enemies in the restaurant business.
Favorite quotes:
Homer: "If he's so smart, how come he's dead?"
Newspaper columnist: "We've been meaning to have a talk with you about your reviews. Everything is a rave! Nine thumbs up, what the hell is that?!"
Number 5: "Pygmoelian" (Episode 242)
Moe gets plastic surgery to look more attractive and ends up staring on a soap opera.
Favorite quotes:
Lenny: "Moe, this liquor license expired in 1973, and it's only good in Rhode Island, and it's signed by you!"
Moe: "Yeah, I've been meaning to get that updated for this state and real."
"Duffman can't breathe! Oh no!"
Number 4: "Faith Off" (Episode 237)
Bart becomes a faith healer while Homer decides to build a float for the Springfield U vs. Springfield A&M football game.
Favorite quotes:
Homer: "I hate Springfield U so much!"
Lisa: "You went to Springfield U, you hate A&M."
Homer: "So much."
Todd: "Is he killing that guitar daddy?"
Flanders: "Yes son."
Number 3: "Brother's Little Helper" (Episode 228)
Bart takes a new drug called "Focusyn" and claims that Major League Baseball is spying on him.
Favorite quotes:
Principal Skinner: "Thank you for coming."
Homer: "Thank you for getting me out of work."
(Marge stands up to the tank that Bart is driving)
Homer: "My God is she brave, standing up to that freaked out junkie."
Lisa: "Dad, that junkie is your son!"
Homer: "Why don't you just tell everybody!"
Number 2: "Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder" (Episode 232)
Homer bowls a 300 game and is a star...for about a week.
Favorite quotes:
Carl: "Homer, what whacky name do you want?"
Homer: "Are Poo and Ass taken?"
(As Homer is drowning in the ocean)
Homer: "Maggie, call Aquaman!"
Number 1: "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner" (Episode 229)
Homer becomes a food critic and, while initially loving everything, starts giving bad reviews and makes a lot of enemies in the restaurant business.
Favorite quotes:
Homer: "If he's so smart, how come he's dead?"
Newspaper columnist: "We've been meaning to have a talk with you about your reviews. Everything is a rave! Nine thumbs up, what the hell is that?!"
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 10)
Number 5: "Homer Simpson in 'Kidney Trouble'" (Episode 211)
Grampa needs a kidney transplant and Homer agrees to give him one. However, Homer doesn't realize that it's major surgery and not just a simple procedure.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "2 hours!? Why did they build this Ghost Town so far away?"
Lisa: "Because they discovered gold right over there."
Homer: "It's because they're stupid. That's why everyone does everything."
Number 4: "They Saved Lisa's Brain" (Episode 225)
Lisa joins the Springfield chapter of MENSA and, after Quimby skips town, helps to run the town, only to see they are too smart for their own good.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "Look I got runner up prize!"
Lisa: "You took second place?"
Homer: "No but I got it!"
(closes door, then opens back up)
Homer: "Stealing is wrong."
Number 3: "Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo" (Episode 226)
The Simpsons take a cheap vacation to Tokyo but lose all their money and have to win their plane tickets home on a Japanese game show.
Favorite quote:
Bart: "Knife goes in, guts come out."
Fish: "Spare my life and I shall grant you three..."
(Fish screams as Bart cuts it)
Bart; "Knife goes in, guts come out."
Number 2: "Viva Ned Flanders" (Episode 213)
Ned tells the town he is 60 years old but has never done anything exciting. Homer decides to help Ned get some excitement in his life...by going to Vegas. However, they get so drunk, they marry two waitresses!
Favorite quote:
Homer: "We've got to get out of this Ned."
Ned: "Well do something, this is all your fault. You and your stupid program!"
Homer: "Blame me if you must but never speak ill of the program! The program is rock solid, the program is sound."
Homer & Ned's new wives: "Yoo hoo!"
Homer: "Oh, those awful women want their omelets."
Number 1: "Wild Barts Can't Be Broken" (Episode 214)
The Springfield Police department imposes a curfew on the children and they decide to get back at everyone by telling their secrets. (One of my all time favorite episodes)
Favorite quote:
Lisa: "And guess who's been practicing medicine without a license?"
(Dr. Hibbert squirms)
Lisa: "That's right...Homer Simpson!"
Homer: "D'oh!"
Grampa needs a kidney transplant and Homer agrees to give him one. However, Homer doesn't realize that it's major surgery and not just a simple procedure.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "2 hours!? Why did they build this Ghost Town so far away?"
Lisa: "Because they discovered gold right over there."
Homer: "It's because they're stupid. That's why everyone does everything."
Number 4: "They Saved Lisa's Brain" (Episode 225)
Lisa joins the Springfield chapter of MENSA and, after Quimby skips town, helps to run the town, only to see they are too smart for their own good.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "Look I got runner up prize!"
Lisa: "You took second place?"
Homer: "No but I got it!"
(closes door, then opens back up)
Homer: "Stealing is wrong."
Number 3: "Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo" (Episode 226)
The Simpsons take a cheap vacation to Tokyo but lose all their money and have to win their plane tickets home on a Japanese game show.
Favorite quote:
Bart: "Knife goes in, guts come out."
Fish: "Spare my life and I shall grant you three..."
(Fish screams as Bart cuts it)
Bart; "Knife goes in, guts come out."
Number 2: "Viva Ned Flanders" (Episode 213)
Ned tells the town he is 60 years old but has never done anything exciting. Homer decides to help Ned get some excitement in his life...by going to Vegas. However, they get so drunk, they marry two waitresses!
Favorite quote:
Homer: "We've got to get out of this Ned."
Ned: "Well do something, this is all your fault. You and your stupid program!"
Homer: "Blame me if you must but never speak ill of the program! The program is rock solid, the program is sound."
Homer & Ned's new wives: "Yoo hoo!"
Homer: "Oh, those awful women want their omelets."
Number 1: "Wild Barts Can't Be Broken" (Episode 214)
The Springfield Police department imposes a curfew on the children and they decide to get back at everyone by telling their secrets. (One of my all time favorite episodes)
Favorite quote:
Lisa: "And guess who's been practicing medicine without a license?"
(Dr. Hibbert squirms)
Lisa: "That's right...Homer Simpson!"
Homer: "D'oh!"
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 9)
I've been watching a lot of Simpsons episodes in order to complete these seasons, which has been awesome.
Number 5: "Lisa the Simpson" (Episode 195)
Lisa is told by Grampa that she is cursed by the "Simpson gene" and she is doomed to lose her intelligence.
Favorite quote:
Lisa: "I'm strongly opposed to Proposition 305."
TV Producer: "You're against discount bus fares for war widows?"
(Later)
Lisa: "I'm supposed to talk to you about Proposition 305."
Homer: "Moochin' war widows."
Number 4: "The Joy of Sect" (Episode 191)
The Simpson family joins the latest fad of a cult, "The Movementarians."
Favorite quote:
"Homer no function beer well without."
Number 3: "Simpson Tide" (Episode 197)
Homer joins the Naval Reserves and, well, you know the rest.
Favorite quote:
Grampa: "My Homer is not a Communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a Communist, but he is NOT a porn star!"
Number 2: "Lisa the Skeptic" (Episode 186)
Lisa discovers an "angel" on an archaeological dig but is skeptical about whether or not it is real.
Favorite quotes:
Mr. Burns: "Oh fiddle faddle, everyone knows our mutants have flippers. Whoops, I've said too much. Smithers, use the amnesia ray."
Smithers: "You mean the revolver sir?"
Mr. Burns: "Precisely. Be sure to wipe your own mind clear when you're finished."
Lisa: "It's gone!"
Homer: "Oh no, this can't be happening! What the hell are we going to do with 10,000 angel ashtrays?"
Bart: "I could take up smoking."
Homer: "You damn well better."
Number 1: "City of New York vs. Homer Simpson" (Episode 179)
Homer's car ends up illegally parked in New York and the Simpsons must go retrieve it.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "Alright New York, I'm coming back, but you're not gettin' this!"
(Throws wallet into fire)
Lisa: "Dad, our baby pictures were in there."
Homer: "Don't you start!"
Number 5: "Lisa the Simpson" (Episode 195)
Lisa is told by Grampa that she is cursed by the "Simpson gene" and she is doomed to lose her intelligence.
Favorite quote:
Lisa: "I'm strongly opposed to Proposition 305."
TV Producer: "You're against discount bus fares for war widows?"
(Later)
Lisa: "I'm supposed to talk to you about Proposition 305."
Homer: "Moochin' war widows."
Number 4: "The Joy of Sect" (Episode 191)
The Simpson family joins the latest fad of a cult, "The Movementarians."
Favorite quote:
"Homer no function beer well without."
Number 3: "Simpson Tide" (Episode 197)
Homer joins the Naval Reserves and, well, you know the rest.
Favorite quote:
Grampa: "My Homer is not a Communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a Communist, but he is NOT a porn star!"
Number 2: "Lisa the Skeptic" (Episode 186)
Lisa discovers an "angel" on an archaeological dig but is skeptical about whether or not it is real.
Favorite quotes:
Mr. Burns: "Oh fiddle faddle, everyone knows our mutants have flippers. Whoops, I've said too much. Smithers, use the amnesia ray."
Smithers: "You mean the revolver sir?"
Mr. Burns: "Precisely. Be sure to wipe your own mind clear when you're finished."
Lisa: "It's gone!"
Homer: "Oh no, this can't be happening! What the hell are we going to do with 10,000 angel ashtrays?"
Bart: "I could take up smoking."
Homer: "You damn well better."
Number 1: "City of New York vs. Homer Simpson" (Episode 179)
Homer's car ends up illegally parked in New York and the Simpsons must go retrieve it.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "Alright New York, I'm coming back, but you're not gettin' this!"
(Throws wallet into fire)
Lisa: "Dad, our baby pictures were in there."
Homer: "Don't you start!"
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 8)
Here is the other season I promised you. I am also closing in on Season 9 being complete as well. I've been watching a lot of TV recently...
Number 5: "In Marge We Trust" (Episode 175)
Marge becomes the "Listen Lady" at church when Rev. Lovejoy decides it's no longer worth listening to people's problems.
Favorite quote:
(Rev. Lovejoy is giving long sermon)
(Homer hits head on pew) "Dammit!"
Number 4: "Hurricane Neddy" (Episode 161)
A hurricane knocks down Ned Flanders' house and he becomes hostile towards town.
Favorite quote:
Ned: "You ugly hate filled man."
Moe: "Hey, I may be ugly and hate filled but...what was the last thing you said?"
Number 3: "Burns Baby Burns" (Episode 157)
Burns is shocked to learn he has a long lost son, Larry Burns (Rodney Dangerfield), who turns out to be a major disappointment.
Favorite quotes:
Mr. Burns: "How were his test scores?"
Yale Professor: "Let's just say this: he spelled Yale with a 6."
Mr. Burns: "You, foodbag, do you have a son?"
Homer: "Yes sir I do."
Mr. Burns: "Is he a constant disappointment? Does he bring home nitwits and make you talk to them?"
Homer: "Oh all the time! Have you ever met this kid Milhouse? He's this little weiner.."
Number 2: "The Springfield Files" (Episode 163)
Homer sees an alien and Mulder and Scully are called to investigate.
Favorite quote:
Groundskeeper Willy: "It's a monster! Kill it!"
Smithers: "It's not a monster, it's Mr. Burns!"
Groundskeeper Willy: "Aw, it's Mr. Burns. Kill it!"
Number 1: "Homer vs. Eighteenth Amendment" (Episode 171)
Prohibition hits Springfield and Homer turns into the Beer Baron to sell booze to the city.
Favorite quotes:
Quimby advisor: "Election in November, election in November."
Mayor Quimby: "Again? This stupid country."
Homer: "We're going out Marge. If we're not back avenge our deaths!"
Marge: "Alright!"
Rex Banner: "Pet shop eh? I just have one question. What kind of pet shop is filled with rambunctious yahoos and hot jazz music at 1 AM?"
Moe: "Um...the best damn pet shop in town!"
Number 5: "In Marge We Trust" (Episode 175)
Marge becomes the "Listen Lady" at church when Rev. Lovejoy decides it's no longer worth listening to people's problems.
Favorite quote:
(Rev. Lovejoy is giving long sermon)
(Homer hits head on pew) "Dammit!"
Number 4: "Hurricane Neddy" (Episode 161)
A hurricane knocks down Ned Flanders' house and he becomes hostile towards town.
Favorite quote:
Ned: "You ugly hate filled man."
Moe: "Hey, I may be ugly and hate filled but...what was the last thing you said?"
Number 3: "Burns Baby Burns" (Episode 157)
Burns is shocked to learn he has a long lost son, Larry Burns (Rodney Dangerfield), who turns out to be a major disappointment.
Favorite quotes:
Mr. Burns: "How were his test scores?"
Yale Professor: "Let's just say this: he spelled Yale with a 6."
Mr. Burns: "You, foodbag, do you have a son?"
Homer: "Yes sir I do."
Mr. Burns: "Is he a constant disappointment? Does he bring home nitwits and make you talk to them?"
Homer: "Oh all the time! Have you ever met this kid Milhouse? He's this little weiner.."
Number 2: "The Springfield Files" (Episode 163)
Homer sees an alien and Mulder and Scully are called to investigate.
Favorite quote:
Groundskeeper Willy: "It's a monster! Kill it!"
Smithers: "It's not a monster, it's Mr. Burns!"
Groundskeeper Willy: "Aw, it's Mr. Burns. Kill it!"
Number 1: "Homer vs. Eighteenth Amendment" (Episode 171)
Prohibition hits Springfield and Homer turns into the Beer Baron to sell booze to the city.
Favorite quotes:
Quimby advisor: "Election in November, election in November."
Mayor Quimby: "Again? This stupid country."
Homer: "We're going out Marge. If we're not back avenge our deaths!"
Marge: "Alright!"
Rex Banner: "Pet shop eh? I just have one question. What kind of pet shop is filled with rambunctious yahoos and hot jazz music at 1 AM?"
Moe: "Um...the best damn pet shop in town!"
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 7)
I know I have slacked off on this since December, but I have two new seasons to give you my favorite quotes from, starting with season 7.
Number 5: "Raging Abe Simpson and His Grumbling Grandson in "The Curse of the Flying Hellfish"" (Episode 150)
You all know which one this is.
Favorite quote:
Monty Burns: "Oh Simpson, can't you go five seconds without embarassing yourself?"
(Pants fall down)
Grampa: "How long was that?"
Number 4: "Team Homer" (Episode 140)
Homer starts his own bowling team but has to deal with one teammate they don't like: Mr. Burns.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "Yeah Moe that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked."
Marge: "Homer, watch your mouth!"
Homer: "Aw, I gotta go. My damn weiner kids are listening."
Number 3: "King Sized Homer" (Episode 135)
Homer gains a lot of weight so he can go on disability and work from home.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "I've got to call the plant to warn them!"
(Tries to dial the number)
Telephone Operator: "The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, mash the key pad with your palm now."
Number 2: "Bart on the Road" (Episode 148)
Bart gets a fake ID and takes Nelson, Martin and Milhouse with him on a cross country trip for Spring Break.
Favorite quote:
Lisa: "Bart rented a car with a phony driver's license and drove Milhouse, Nelson and Martin to a wig outlet in Knoxville and the car got crushed and they're out of money and they can't get home and Bart's working as a courier and just came back from Hong Kong."
Homer: "Yes. That's a real pickle. Would you excuse me for a moment?"
(gets into radiation suit and screams/curses)
Homer: "Alright, I have thought this through. I will send Bart the money to fly home, then I will murder him."
Number 1: "Summer of 4 Foot 2" (Episode 153)
The family takes a trip to the Flanders cottage and Lisa makes friends with some cool kids.
Favorite quote:
(While playing "Mystery Date")
Marge: "Come on Bart, your turn, your turn!"
(Bart picks card)
Marge: "Oh, you got the dud!"
Homer: "Ah ha ha ha ha! He looks just like you poindexter!"
Number 5: "Raging Abe Simpson and His Grumbling Grandson in "The Curse of the Flying Hellfish"" (Episode 150)
You all know which one this is.
Favorite quote:
Monty Burns: "Oh Simpson, can't you go five seconds without embarassing yourself?"
(Pants fall down)
Grampa: "How long was that?"
Number 4: "Team Homer" (Episode 140)
Homer starts his own bowling team but has to deal with one teammate they don't like: Mr. Burns.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "Yeah Moe that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked."
Marge: "Homer, watch your mouth!"
Homer: "Aw, I gotta go. My damn weiner kids are listening."
Number 3: "King Sized Homer" (Episode 135)
Homer gains a lot of weight so he can go on disability and work from home.
Favorite quote:
Homer: "I've got to call the plant to warn them!"
(Tries to dial the number)
Telephone Operator: "The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, mash the key pad with your palm now."
Number 2: "Bart on the Road" (Episode 148)
Bart gets a fake ID and takes Nelson, Martin and Milhouse with him on a cross country trip for Spring Break.
Favorite quote:
Lisa: "Bart rented a car with a phony driver's license and drove Milhouse, Nelson and Martin to a wig outlet in Knoxville and the car got crushed and they're out of money and they can't get home and Bart's working as a courier and just came back from Hong Kong."
Homer: "Yes. That's a real pickle. Would you excuse me for a moment?"
(gets into radiation suit and screams/curses)
Homer: "Alright, I have thought this through. I will send Bart the money to fly home, then I will murder him."
Number 1: "Summer of 4 Foot 2" (Episode 153)
The family takes a trip to the Flanders cottage and Lisa makes friends with some cool kids.
Favorite quote:
(While playing "Mystery Date")
Marge: "Come on Bart, your turn, your turn!"
(Bart picks card)
Marge: "Oh, you got the dud!"
Homer: "Ah ha ha ha ha! He looks just like you poindexter!"
Monday, February 16, 2009
New Simpsons Opening
I'm surprised it took them this long to create a new sequence. Only 20 years right? I must say though, I do enjoy this opening with the new graphics and updated technology.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 6)
So many of these episodes are bringing back those memories and shows me how funny they still are, all these years later.
Number 5: "Round Springfield" (Episode 125)
Bart eats a metallic Krusty-O and, while he recovers in the hospital, Lisa runs into an old friend, Bleeding Gums Murphy.
Favorite quote:
Hot dog vendor: "Hot dogs! Get your hot dogs here!"
Homer: "Woo hoo!"
Marge: "What do you do, follow my husband around?"
Hot dog vendor: "Lady, he's putting my kids through college!"
Number 4: "Bart of Darkness" (Episode 104)
The summer heat is cranking up and the Simpson children decide to annoy Homer and Marge enough that they get their own pool. Bart breaks his leg and cannot enjoy it so decides to spy on people with his telescope.
Favorite quotes:
Homer: "All right, everybody in the pool!"
Amish Guy: "It's a fine barn but sure 'tis no pool English."
Homer: "Doe'th!"
"Don't be alarmed, continue swimming naked. Oh come on! Ah, alright Lou open fire." - Chief Wiggum
Number 3: "A Star is Burns" (Episode 121)
Springfield decides to host a film festival and they bring in Jay Sherman from "The Critic" to help out.
Favorite quote:
Barney: "My name is Barney Gumbel and I'm an alcoholic."
Lisa: "Mr. Gumbel, this is a girl scout meeting."
Barney: "Is it? Or is it that you girls can't admit you have a problem?"
Number 2: "Homer the Great" (Episode 115)
Need I say more than one word to describe this episode: Stonecutters
Favorite quote:
Grampa: "I'm an Elk, a Mason, a Communist, I'm the President of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance for some reason, ah here it is, the Stonecutters."
Homer: "This is it! This is my ticket in! They have to let me join if I'm the son of a member! I'll take this Communist one too."
Number 1: "Treehouse of Horror V" (Episode 109)
The Shinning, Time and Punishment and Nightmare Cafeteria.
Favorite quotes:
Homer: "David Letterman!"
Grampa: "Hi David, I'm Grampa!"
"Oh I wish I wish I hadn't killed that fish." - Homer
Number 5: "Round Springfield" (Episode 125)
Bart eats a metallic Krusty-O and, while he recovers in the hospital, Lisa runs into an old friend, Bleeding Gums Murphy.
Favorite quote:
Hot dog vendor: "Hot dogs! Get your hot dogs here!"
Homer: "Woo hoo!"
Marge: "What do you do, follow my husband around?"
Hot dog vendor: "Lady, he's putting my kids through college!"
Number 4: "Bart of Darkness" (Episode 104)
The summer heat is cranking up and the Simpson children decide to annoy Homer and Marge enough that they get their own pool. Bart breaks his leg and cannot enjoy it so decides to spy on people with his telescope.
Favorite quotes:
Homer: "All right, everybody in the pool!"
Amish Guy: "It's a fine barn but sure 'tis no pool English."
Homer: "Doe'th!"
"Don't be alarmed, continue swimming naked. Oh come on! Ah, alright Lou open fire." - Chief Wiggum
Number 3: "A Star is Burns" (Episode 121)
Springfield decides to host a film festival and they bring in Jay Sherman from "The Critic" to help out.
Favorite quote:
Barney: "My name is Barney Gumbel and I'm an alcoholic."
Lisa: "Mr. Gumbel, this is a girl scout meeting."
Barney: "Is it? Or is it that you girls can't admit you have a problem?"
Number 2: "Homer the Great" (Episode 115)
Need I say more than one word to describe this episode: Stonecutters
Favorite quote:
Grampa: "I'm an Elk, a Mason, a Communist, I'm the President of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance for some reason, ah here it is, the Stonecutters."
Homer: "This is it! This is my ticket in! They have to let me join if I'm the son of a member! I'll take this Communist one too."
Number 1: "Treehouse of Horror V" (Episode 109)
The Shinning, Time and Punishment and Nightmare Cafeteria.
Favorite quotes:
Homer: "David Letterman!"
Grampa: "Hi David, I'm Grampa!"
"Oh I wish I wish I hadn't killed that fish." - Homer
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 5)
It is getting harder and harder to choose a top 5! I may have to change format soon.
Number 5: "Homer Loves Flanders" (Episode 97)
Flanders wins tickets to the big football game and invites Homer, who then becomes best friends with Flanders...much to Flanders annoyance.
Favorite quote:
"Men, there's a little crippled boy sitting in a hospital somewhere who wants you to win this game. I know because I crippled him to inspire you." - Mr. Burns
Number 4: "Lady Bouvier's Lover" (Episode 102)
Marge's mother is smitten with both Abe Simpson and Mr. Burns, ultimately walking to the altar with Burns, but leaves with Grampa.
Favorite quote:
"You know, you remind me of a poem I can't remember, and a song that may never have existed, and a place I'm not sure I've ever been to." - Grampa
Number 3: "Homer's Barbershop Quartet" (Episode 82)
The Be Sharps story is the topic of this episode.
Favorite quote:
"Dad, thanks to television I can't remember what happened eight minutes ago. Really I can't, it's a serious problem!" - Bart
Number 2: "Cape Feare" (Episode 83)
Sideshow Bob sends Bart threatening letters, forcing the Simpsons to become the Thompsons in Witness Protection.
Favorite quote:
Bart: "Take him away boys."
Chief Wiggum: "Hey, I'm the Chief here. Bake him away toys."
Lou: "What did you say Chief?"
Chief Wiggum: "Do what the kid says."
Number 1: "Treehouse of Horror IV" (Episode 86)
The three minisodes include "The Devil and Homer Simpson," "Terror at 5 1/2 feet," and "Bart Simpsons Dracula."
Favorite quotes:
Mr. Burns: "Welcome, come in! Ah fresh victims for my ever growing army of the undead."
Smithers: "Sir you have to let go of the button."
Mr. Burns: "Well son of a bit..."
Homer: "Wait a minute, you are a vampire!"
Grampa: "Quick, we have to kill the boy!"
Marge: "How'd you know he was a vampire?"
Grampa: "He's a vampire?! AHHH!"
Number 5: "Homer Loves Flanders" (Episode 97)
Flanders wins tickets to the big football game and invites Homer, who then becomes best friends with Flanders...much to Flanders annoyance.
Favorite quote:
"Men, there's a little crippled boy sitting in a hospital somewhere who wants you to win this game. I know because I crippled him to inspire you." - Mr. Burns
Number 4: "Lady Bouvier's Lover" (Episode 102)
Marge's mother is smitten with both Abe Simpson and Mr. Burns, ultimately walking to the altar with Burns, but leaves with Grampa.
Favorite quote:
"You know, you remind me of a poem I can't remember, and a song that may never have existed, and a place I'm not sure I've ever been to." - Grampa
Number 3: "Homer's Barbershop Quartet" (Episode 82)
The Be Sharps story is the topic of this episode.
Favorite quote:
"Dad, thanks to television I can't remember what happened eight minutes ago. Really I can't, it's a serious problem!" - Bart
Number 2: "Cape Feare" (Episode 83)
Sideshow Bob sends Bart threatening letters, forcing the Simpsons to become the Thompsons in Witness Protection.
Favorite quote:
Bart: "Take him away boys."
Chief Wiggum: "Hey, I'm the Chief here. Bake him away toys."
Lou: "What did you say Chief?"
Chief Wiggum: "Do what the kid says."
Number 1: "Treehouse of Horror IV" (Episode 86)
The three minisodes include "The Devil and Homer Simpson," "Terror at 5 1/2 feet," and "Bart Simpsons Dracula."
Favorite quotes:
Mr. Burns: "Welcome, come in! Ah fresh victims for my ever growing army of the undead."
Smithers: "Sir you have to let go of the button."
Mr. Burns: "Well son of a bit..."
Homer: "Wait a minute, you are a vampire!"
Grampa: "Quick, we have to kill the boy!"
Marge: "How'd you know he was a vampire?"
Grampa: "He's a vampire?! AHHH!"
Friday, November 28, 2008
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 4)
The seasons start to get better and better!
Number 5: "Last Exit to Springfield" (Episode 76)
In this episode, Mr. Burns takes away the Dental Plan from the Springfield Power Plant Union and they elect Homer President of the Union to get back the plan, mostly because Lisa needs braces too.
Favorite quote:
"Where's my burrito? Where's my burrito?" - Homer
Number 4: "Krusty Gets Kancelled" (Episode 81)
Gabbo makes his way to Springfield, taking over Krusty's time slot and forcing his show into cancellation. With the help of Bette Midler, Hugh Hefner and Johnny Carson, he gets a special show together and kicks out Gabbo.
Favorite quote:
"Come on you stupid horse, I've got my last ten bucks on you! No, don't look at me! Run!! No, don't come over here. Oh boy." - Krusty
Number 3: "Treehouse of Horror III" (Episode 64)
Episodes include "Clown Without Pity," "King Homer," and "Dial "Z" for Zombie."
Favorite quote:
Bart: "Grampa, where'd you get the money?"
Grampa: "The government. I didn't earn it, I don't need it, but if they miss one payment I'll raise hell!"
Number 2: "Homer's Triple Bypass" (Episode 70)
Homer's continuous bad eating habits catch up to him as he has a heart attack and must go to Dr. Nick to get an inexpensive surgery.
Favorite quote (I have two):
Marge: "Homer's in the hospital, they think it's his heart!"
Patty/Selma: "Oh my God! Five cents off wax paper."
Homer: "Kids, I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people."
Lisa: "What about Abe Lincoln?"
Homer: "He sold poison milk to school children."
Number 1: "So It's Come to This: A Simpsons Clip Show" (Episode 77)
The classic April Fool's episode where Bart shakes up the Duff can which puts Homer into the hospital.
Favorite quote:
"Coma? I go in and out of comas all the (zzzzzzz) French toast please." - Grampa
Number 5: "Last Exit to Springfield" (Episode 76)
In this episode, Mr. Burns takes away the Dental Plan from the Springfield Power Plant Union and they elect Homer President of the Union to get back the plan, mostly because Lisa needs braces too.
Favorite quote:
"Where's my burrito? Where's my burrito?" - Homer
Number 4: "Krusty Gets Kancelled" (Episode 81)
Gabbo makes his way to Springfield, taking over Krusty's time slot and forcing his show into cancellation. With the help of Bette Midler, Hugh Hefner and Johnny Carson, he gets a special show together and kicks out Gabbo.
Favorite quote:
"Come on you stupid horse, I've got my last ten bucks on you! No, don't look at me! Run!! No, don't come over here. Oh boy." - Krusty
Number 3: "Treehouse of Horror III" (Episode 64)
Episodes include "Clown Without Pity," "King Homer," and "Dial "Z" for Zombie."
Favorite quote:
Bart: "Grampa, where'd you get the money?"
Grampa: "The government. I didn't earn it, I don't need it, but if they miss one payment I'll raise hell!"
Number 2: "Homer's Triple Bypass" (Episode 70)
Homer's continuous bad eating habits catch up to him as he has a heart attack and must go to Dr. Nick to get an inexpensive surgery.
Favorite quote (I have two):
Marge: "Homer's in the hospital, they think it's his heart!"
Patty/Selma: "Oh my God! Five cents off wax paper."
Homer: "Kids, I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people."
Lisa: "What about Abe Lincoln?"
Homer: "He sold poison milk to school children."
Number 1: "So It's Come to This: A Simpsons Clip Show" (Episode 77)
The classic April Fool's episode where Bart shakes up the Duff can which puts Homer into the hospital.
Favorite quote:
"Coma? I go in and out of comas all the (zzzzzzz) French toast please." - Grampa
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 3)
I told you I had it completed but I just now finalized it. Enjoy!
Number 5: “Like Father, Like Clown” (Episode 41)
Krusty goes to the Simpson household for dinner and is reminded of his estrangement to his Rabbi father. Bart & Lisa attempt to find him and convince him to reconcile with his son, for both of their sakes.
Favorite quote:
Homer: “Son, you don’t have to follow in my footsteps.”
Bart: “Don’t worry, I don’t even like using the bathroom after you.”
Number 4: “Black Widower” (Episode 56)
Sideshow Bob marries Selma after being released from prison. She begins to despise her and eventually plans to kill her by running the gas in their honeymoon apartment, waiting for her to light a match for her cigarette and blow herself sky high. Bart, however, foils his plans once again.
Favorite quote:
Bart: “Chief Wiggum, you think you have room in jail for a two time loser?”
Chief Wiggum: “Well no frankly, but that never stopped us before!”
Number 3: “Brother, Can You Spare Two Dimes?” (Episode 59)
Herb returns with a new idea of how to make his fortune back. He creates a machine that translates baby talk so parents can understand what their kids are saying. He reconciles with Homer and buys the family gifts. Homer also won the Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence.
Favorite quote:
Scientist: “This can’t be right; this man has 104% body fat! Hey, no eating in the tank!”
Homer: “Go to hell.”
Number 2: “Homer at the Bat” (Episode 52)
The Plant softball team goes on a huge winning streak with Homer’s lucky bat but Burns makes a wager with the Shelbyville Power Plant owner for the Championship game and he does not want to lose. He goes out and recruits baseball players like Ozzie Smith, Jose Canseco, Don Mattingly and Roger Clemens. In the end, something weird happens to each one of them (except Darryl Strawberry) and Homer “drives” in the winning run.
Favorite quote:
Homer: “You’re Darryl Strawberry.”
D.S.: “Yes.”
Homer: “You play right field.”
D.S.: “So?”
Homer: “Well, are you better than me?”
D.S.: “Well I’ve never met you but…yes.”
Number 1: “Treehouse of Horror II” (Episode 42)
The kids and Homer eat too much candy and each has their own nightmare. Lisa’s nightmare includes a monkey claw that grants wishes, Bart’s includes him as a monster that makes everyone think happy thoughts, and Homer’s involves him being killed and his brain transplanted into a robot.
Favorite quote:
Smithers: “Did you hear that sir?”
Mr. Burns: “No, I didn’t, who is it? Frankenstein? The Boogerman?”
Smithers: “It’s the man in the bag sir, I think he’s alive.”
Mr. Burns: “Oh. (beating bag with shovel) Bad corpse! Bad corpse! Stop scaring Smithers.”
Coming soon...Season 4!
Number 5: “Like Father, Like Clown” (Episode 41)
Krusty goes to the Simpson household for dinner and is reminded of his estrangement to his Rabbi father. Bart & Lisa attempt to find him and convince him to reconcile with his son, for both of their sakes.
Favorite quote:
Homer: “Son, you don’t have to follow in my footsteps.”
Bart: “Don’t worry, I don’t even like using the bathroom after you.”
Number 4: “Black Widower” (Episode 56)
Sideshow Bob marries Selma after being released from prison. She begins to despise her and eventually plans to kill her by running the gas in their honeymoon apartment, waiting for her to light a match for her cigarette and blow herself sky high. Bart, however, foils his plans once again.
Favorite quote:
Bart: “Chief Wiggum, you think you have room in jail for a two time loser?”
Chief Wiggum: “Well no frankly, but that never stopped us before!”
Number 3: “Brother, Can You Spare Two Dimes?” (Episode 59)
Herb returns with a new idea of how to make his fortune back. He creates a machine that translates baby talk so parents can understand what their kids are saying. He reconciles with Homer and buys the family gifts. Homer also won the Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence.
Favorite quote:
Scientist: “This can’t be right; this man has 104% body fat! Hey, no eating in the tank!”
Homer: “Go to hell.”
Number 2: “Homer at the Bat” (Episode 52)
The Plant softball team goes on a huge winning streak with Homer’s lucky bat but Burns makes a wager with the Shelbyville Power Plant owner for the Championship game and he does not want to lose. He goes out and recruits baseball players like Ozzie Smith, Jose Canseco, Don Mattingly and Roger Clemens. In the end, something weird happens to each one of them (except Darryl Strawberry) and Homer “drives” in the winning run.
Favorite quote:
Homer: “You’re Darryl Strawberry.”
D.S.: “Yes.”
Homer: “You play right field.”
D.S.: “So?”
Homer: “Well, are you better than me?”
D.S.: “Well I’ve never met you but…yes.”
Number 1: “Treehouse of Horror II” (Episode 42)
The kids and Homer eat too much candy and each has their own nightmare. Lisa’s nightmare includes a monkey claw that grants wishes, Bart’s includes him as a monster that makes everyone think happy thoughts, and Homer’s involves him being killed and his brain transplanted into a robot.
Favorite quote:
Smithers: “Did you hear that sir?”
Mr. Burns: “No, I didn’t, who is it? Frankenstein? The Boogerman?”
Smithers: “It’s the man in the bag sir, I think he’s alive.”
Mr. Burns: “Oh. (beating bag with shovel) Bad corpse! Bad corpse! Stop scaring Smithers.”
Coming soon...Season 4!
Top 5 Simpsons Episodes (Season 2)
The next batch of Simpsons episodes has arrived! I have actually completed Season 3 as well and will be posting that soon. Enjoy!
Number 5: “Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?” (Episode 28)
Homer finds out he has a half-brother, Herbert Powell (voiced by Danny DeVito), who lives in Detroit. Homer goes to visit him only to discover he is rich and owns Powell Motors. He ultimately lets Homer design the car for the average man, which is so terrible it bankrupts Herb.
Favorite quote:
“A millionaire?! (whispers to himself) I kept the wrong one.” – Grampa
Number 4: “Lisa’s Substitute” (Episode 32)
Ms. Hoover goes out on a medical leave with Lyme Disease and is replaced with Mr. Bergstrom (voiced by Dustin Hoffman). Lisa loves the style of teaching and how much she is learning from Mr. Bergstrom that she is devastated when Ms. Hoover returns.
Favorite quote:
“Hey, just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand” – Homer
Number 3: “Bart Gets an F” (Episode 14)
Bart fails a test and is threatened to be held back a year if he does not improve. He enlists the help of Martin Prince and prays for a snow day so that he can have another day to study. Despite his best efforts, he still fails the test but, after an obscure historical reference, he passes with a D-.
Favorite quote:
“I got a D-, I passed! I got a D-, I passed! I passed! I…kissed the teacher!” – Bart
Number 2: “Bart Gets Hit by a Car” (Episode 23)
Bart gets hit by Mr. Burns while skateboarding and is promised by Lionel Hutz they will receive a big cash settlement. He takes Bart to Dr. Nick for further examination, which is all phony. Marge’s conscience gets the best of her and Burns finds out about the phony diagnosis and retracts his settlement.
Favorite quote:
Lawyer: “Your Honor, my client has instructed me to remind the court how rich and important he is, and that he is not like other men.”
Mr. Burns: “I should be able to run over as many kids as I want!”
Number 1: Treehouse of Horror (Episode 16)
The three sections of the episode include “Bad Dream House,” “Hungry are the Damned” and “The Raven.” The episode (and the next two following) are labeled “The Simpson’s Halloween Special” and not yet the Treehouse title.
Favorite quote:
The entire poem “The Raven” as it is one of my favorite poems.
Number 5: “Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?” (Episode 28)
Homer finds out he has a half-brother, Herbert Powell (voiced by Danny DeVito), who lives in Detroit. Homer goes to visit him only to discover he is rich and owns Powell Motors. He ultimately lets Homer design the car for the average man, which is so terrible it bankrupts Herb.
Favorite quote:
“A millionaire?! (whispers to himself) I kept the wrong one.” – Grampa
Number 4: “Lisa’s Substitute” (Episode 32)
Ms. Hoover goes out on a medical leave with Lyme Disease and is replaced with Mr. Bergstrom (voiced by Dustin Hoffman). Lisa loves the style of teaching and how much she is learning from Mr. Bergstrom that she is devastated when Ms. Hoover returns.
Favorite quote:
“Hey, just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand” – Homer
Number 3: “Bart Gets an F” (Episode 14)
Bart fails a test and is threatened to be held back a year if he does not improve. He enlists the help of Martin Prince and prays for a snow day so that he can have another day to study. Despite his best efforts, he still fails the test but, after an obscure historical reference, he passes with a D-.
Favorite quote:
“I got a D-, I passed! I got a D-, I passed! I passed! I…kissed the teacher!” – Bart
Number 2: “Bart Gets Hit by a Car” (Episode 23)
Bart gets hit by Mr. Burns while skateboarding and is promised by Lionel Hutz they will receive a big cash settlement. He takes Bart to Dr. Nick for further examination, which is all phony. Marge’s conscience gets the best of her and Burns finds out about the phony diagnosis and retracts his settlement.
Favorite quote:
Lawyer: “Your Honor, my client has instructed me to remind the court how rich and important he is, and that he is not like other men.”
Mr. Burns: “I should be able to run over as many kids as I want!”
Number 1: Treehouse of Horror (Episode 16)
The three sections of the episode include “Bad Dream House,” “Hungry are the Damned” and “The Raven.” The episode (and the next two following) are labeled “The Simpson’s Halloween Special” and not yet the Treehouse title.
Favorite quote:
The entire poem “The Raven” as it is one of my favorite poems.
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