Monday, July 30, 2007

Not that I condone the use of Marijuana...

Wait. Yeah I do. I totally fucking do.
 
And because I do, here is some rather interesting information brought to you by and ex-narcotics officer turned pro-pot crusader. (Thanks, Radar)
 
"The war on drugs is an utterly losing proposition," he tells Radar. "We caused more harm breaking up families to put non-violent drug offenders in jail than the drugs ever did. And for what? To eradicate 1/10th of a percent of drugs on the street."
 
And here is the Kicker:
 
• Hiding your drugs in food is also a wise move. The mixed smells will throw off a dog.
 
dare-jesus-bumper-stickers.jpg
 
• DO NOT put any of the following on your vehicle, they're red flags: D.A.R.E. stickers, Jesus Fish, your Kappa Sig frat sticker, or Vietnam vet stickers.
 
Suck it, Jesus Fish.
 
Also, Stoners Vs Six-Year-Olds. Amazing.
 
And if that doesnt quite do it for you, and you want just a bit more info on the po-po in general....check out this biznatch.


Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative vehicles.
Visit the Yahoo! Auto Green Center.

OMIGOD, OMIGOD, OMIGOD.

 
Scarlett Johansson Is going to play Jenna Jameson in an X-rated Biopic called, "ALL OF MY DREAMS CAME TRUE".


Sick sense of humor? Visit Yahoo! TV's Comedy with an Edge to see what's on, when.

You know you're not getting enough play when...

Howard the Duck
 
Howard the Duck can make Lea Thompson...
 
 
Swoon in less than 120 minutes.
 
Right, Rambo?


Be a better Globetrotter. Get better travel answers from someone who knows.
Yahoo! Answers - Check it out.

American Graffiti...

Graffiti Picture 9


Fussy? Opinionated? Impossible to please? Perfect. Join Yahoo!'s user panel and lay it on us.

Today in History...

Image:Jimmy riddle hoffa.jpg
 
James Riddle "Jimmy" Hoffa (February 14, 1913, disappeared July 30, 1975, date of death unknown) was an American labor leader, and criminal convict. As the president of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters from the mid-1950s to the mid-1960s, Hoffa wielded considerable influence. After his conviction, he served nearly a decade in prison. He is also well-known in popular culture for the mysterious circumstances surrounding his unexplained disappearance and presumed death. His son James P. Hoffa is the current president of the Teamsters.
 
In 1964, Hoffa was convicted of attempted bribery of a grand juror and jailed for 15 years. On December 23, 1971,[1], however, he was released when Republican President Richard Nixon commuted his sentence to time served on the condition he not participate in union activities for 10 years. Hoffa was planning to sue to invalidate that restriction in order to reassert his power over the Teamsters when he disappeared at 2:30 pm on July 30, 1975, from the parking lot of the Machus Red Fox Restaurant in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan, a suburb of Detroit. He had been due to meet two Mafia leaders, Anthony "Tony Jack" Giacalone from Detroit and Anthony "Tony Pro" Provenzano from Union City, New Jersey and New York City.


Pinpoint customers who are looking for what you sell.

Eye Candy of the Day...

Temptress, Jakki Degg Art Print

The Daily ClusterFuck...

capt.1059132117.japan_politics_xits104.jpg
 
Japanese Politics and the Revenge of the Middle Classes
 
Steve Martin got married. In other news, Steve Martin is still alive.
 
Bill Gates is stepping down from Microsoft. Or so it seems. So it goes.
 
Paris Hilton had a 60$ million inheritance coming to her, "But the 79-year-old considered her 23-day sentence last month the last straw." Oops.
 
Oh, I get it...Iran is enriching uranium for electrical power. Wait, where are the power stations?
 
Hillary Clinton is a giant douchebag with nasty cleavage. Oh, and she doesn't want you to talk about her low hanging breasts.
 
"Would-Be Rapist Foiled by Chatty Victim Until 911 Call Can Be Made"


Shape Yahoo! in your own image. Join our Network Research Panel today!

Pat Tillman...

Army Ranger, Atheist, Murdered.
 
"I thought I was praying to myself, but I guess he heard me," Sgt. Bryan O'Neal recalled in an interview Saturday with The Associated Press. "He said something like, 'Hey, O'Neal, why are you praying? God can't help us now."'


Take the Internet to Go: Yahoo!Go puts the Internet in your pocket: mail, news, photos & more.

So, Kiznox...

I don't know if this has been brought up before...

but...

what's with all the ellipses in all of your post titles?

...

I eagerly await reply...

:)

Quote of the Day


"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." - Aristotle


This is one of my favorite quotes. It can be applied in so many different ways, and it's what I truly wish everyone in the world knew.

GO BLUE!

The University of Michigan has hit the Running Back Jackpot! Announced last night after seemingly weeks of speculation Texas Cy-Fair RB Sam McGuffie has announced that he has committed to the University of Michigan. Watching some of the videos of this RB has truly astounded me and has given me EVEN MORE reason to fully enjoy college football and, more specifically, U of M football. There are multiple highlight reels out there for you to look in awe at. He is one of the fastest guys I have seen, he can juke and spin, and he now will wear the ever recognizable Maize n' Blue.

"I went to the University of Michigan a couple weeks ago and you know, I fell in love with it. The coaches--Coach Jackson--and the running back staff, and all the Michigan Wolverines. It's just a place where I can come in as a freshman and be an impact player."

McGruffie has only been given 4 stars by Rivals and Scout, but many feel that is because he is white..."Wow" is the only word that comes to mind with that. Honestly, can this be true? I know we haven't seen a lot of great running backs in history be white but for God's sake! The kid is 6 feet, 188 pounds, ran the 40 in 4.32, can bench 355 pounds and carried the ball his senior year 358 times for 3,121 yards and 43 touchdowns! What more can you say? However, he's white so there is no way he can be THAT good. When it's all said and done who honestly cares though. Those who victimize him with these comments are not looking at his potential and what he truly means to true Michigan fans like myself and those who crowd into Michigan Stadium every home game. I am excited to see this kid smash through the line or outrun a linebacker to the sideline and then turn on the jets. I will be sad to see Mike Hart leave after this year but I am very confident his position is well taken care of.

Somebody Please Explain this to me...

 
The Lost Girls Series by Alan Moore and Melinda Gebbie.
 
What the fuck good is cartoon semi-porn if it is not drawn as well as it could be and looks more like a nightmarish mind-fuck than anything else?

Damn you, Comic Con!


Looking for a deal? Find great prices on flights and hotels with Yahoo! FareChase.

I have a response...

To the supremely surprising political posts by Rambo and Cottonmouth, however I will not be posting it tonight. I have spent a great deal of time working on an article to continue the discussion, however tonight is not the time.
 
Why? Why would I wait to unleash an article of such importance?
 
Because the issue is so important to me. Because I want to make sure that everything is fact-checked and well written. Because when I get tired this late at night, (lets face it, without beer my bed time would be 12am) I have a tendency to curse and react, rather than think things through thoroughly.
 
So I will leave you with this: I applaud that this issue has been brought up by my fellow bloggers. It is extremely nice to read and see that you guys have an opinion about such things.

Just do it more often.


Luggage? GPS? Comic books?
Check out fitting gifts for grads at Yahoo! Search.

This Really Irks Me...Like, A Lot

So, I don't smoke [cigarettes]. Like ever. Smoking them makes me want to rip out my esophagus and strangle myself to death with it. But I am very lenient when it comes to my friends smoking, especially in my car. I let my friends smoke in my car, as long as they try to keep most of it outside and try not to burn anything (burn it and buy it sort of thing). Ok, I'm fine with that. I just find it very rude that when some of my friends smoke in my car they roll up the window while blowing out the last bit of smoke. THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE! I don't know if they can smell cigarette smoke anymore, but I can smell it like it's being blasted straight into my nostrils. So please, if you have an ounce of kindness in your body, keep the fucking window rolled down until the fucking smell is out of my car!

Its like Christmas, Only Better...

garage
 
"Their manufacturing plans are modest — maybe 20 or so cars a year. But it would be quite a comeback for a car that was given up for dead more than a quarter of a century ago."
Futurama comeback finalized as 4 DVD movies, (16 episodes) to be aired on Comedy Central.
 
OMIGOD. OMIGOD. OMIGOD. IRON MAN TRAILER FROM COMIC CON. OMIGOD. OMIGOD. OMIGOD.


Ready for the edge of your seat? Check out tonight's top picks on Yahoo! TV.

The Daily ClusterFuck...

2002-07-25-grabby.jpg
If you guessed, Lindsay Lohan, You Win! Lawyery-advice here.
 
Stupid Can be fixed!
 
Ahem..."Beds are beds, but Tempur-Pedic will help you fuck a hooker while your wife is sound asleep with a glass of wine."
 
Only in the Lone Star State: "Creationist to Head Texas School Board." God 1, Darwin 0.
 
Sixty days for Masturbating? Worth it.
 
Astronauts work at NASA, right? And these people are smart, right? So then its totally cool that they get all shit-faced before launch. Right?
 
 
Is it bad that I want to label this Awesome? "Crow flies into electricity cable, bursts into flames and hurtles into haystack which catches fire, spreading blaze to entire field."
 
Omigod. Its a funny story Wet Dream!
 
Iran admits it has enough centrifuges to make a nuclear bomb, but insists it would never use one, because that would be suicide. Ahem...BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE SUICIDE. (and if none of you get that, then I might have to commit suicide)
 
You want proof the War on Drugs is a FUCKING WASTE OF TIME? Here ya go.
 
Man Sues McDonalds for 13 cents. China is just fucking weird.
 
Sheik delays flight for three hours after finding out three of his female relatives were seated next to men they didn't know. The flight was eventually cleared for takeoff after airline personnel kicked the Sheik off the plane. Suck it, Qatar.
 
Thats the news. Thats the news. Thats the news.
 
I need a cigarette.


Park yourself in front of a world of choices in alternative vehicles.
Visit the Yahoo! Auto Green Center.

Sunday, July 29, 2007

American Graffiti...


Looking for a deal? Find great prices on flights and hotels with Yahoo! FareChase.

Best Police Chase Ever...

Scooter rider is followed by a police van over Newport Bridge
 
 
Of All Time. EVER.


Luggage? GPS? Comic books?
Check out fitting gifts for grads at Yahoo! Search.

Today in History...

"I am deeply hurt by your calling me a wemon(Woman) hater. I am not. But I am a monster. I am the "Son of Sam." I am a little brat. When father Sam gets drunk he gets mean. He beats his family. Sometimes he ties me up to the back of the house. Other times he locks me in the garage. Sam loves to drink blood. "Go out and kill," commands father Sam. Behind our house some rest. Mostly young -- raped and slaughtered -- their blood drained -- just bones now. Papa Sam keeps me locked in the attic too. I can't get out but I look out the attic window and watch the world go by. I feel like an outsider. I am on a different wavelength then everybody else -- programmed too kill. However, to stop me you must kill me. Attention all police: Shoot me first -- shoot to kill or else keep out of my way or you will die! Papa Sam is old now. He needs some blood to preserve his youth. He has had too many heart attacks. "Ugh, me hoot, it hurts, sonny boy." I miss my pretty princess most of all. She's resting in our ladies house. But I'll see her soon. I am the "Monster" -- "Beelzebub" -- the chubby behemouth. I love to hunt. Prowling the streets looking for fair game -- tasty meat. The wemon of Queens are prettyist of all. It must be the water they drink. I live for the hunt -- my life. Blood for papa. Mr. Borrelli, sir, I don't want to kill anymore. No sur, no more but I must, 'honour thy father.' I want to make love to the world. I love people. I don't belong on earth. Return me to yahoos. To the people of Queens, I love you. And I want to wish all of you a happy Easter. May God bless you in this life and in the next. And for now I say goodbye and goodnight. Police: Let me haunt you with these words: I'll be back! I'll be back! To be interpreted as - bang bang bang, bank, bang - ugh!!

Yours in murder,
Mr. Monster"

In the evening of July 29, 1976, Donna Lauria, 18, and Jody Valenti, 19, were both shot as they sat inside a car parked on the street outside Lauria's apartment in the Bronx.

The Summer of Sam had begun.

Looking forward to this...

Dimension Films' Halloween - 2007
I know what many of you may be thinking...who cares it's just gonna be another shitty scary movie. I honestly don't know if I believe that. Granted I have not become too fond of Rob Zombie's other works ( e.g. House of 1000 Corpses and The Devil's Rejects) but this seems to be different. It will come as no surprise when I say that Rob Zombie has made some "different" types of music, not all bad but not all good either. However, he has stated that he wants to go into great depth about a lot of aspects of Michael Myers life and how he became this killer, why he's really looking for his sister Laurie, how he came to get the mask, how he broke out of the institution, and to show what a true psychopath really is. I am very intrigued to get an in depth look at the life and times of this fictional murderer. The original Halloween in 1978 was a classic in it's own right and Zombie has said that he will not simply re-do the original movie...he will re-imagine it.There is quite a bit of character development that could be done for Myers and I think Zombie has what it takes to truly bring out something truly fascinating...and come on, who doesn't want to see just what's going on in the head of the man in the white mask? I'm also interested to see how Zombie handles the family situation as the movie will begin with Myers as a young child when he murders his family and move onto his being committed to Dr. Loomis' institution and his subsequent stalking of his sister Laurie.
Here is the synopsis courtesy of our friends at Wikipedia:
In a small and quiet Illinois town called Haddonfield, lived a young boy, Michael Myers, and his family. And if everyone in the Myers' house was quite odd, Michael was without any doubt the weirdest. On Halloween night, 10-year-old Michael savagely murdered his family : he stabbed his elder sister Judith and beat his mother's boyfriend to death with a bat. He was eventually committed to a psychiatric hospital,leaving behind the only person he ever loved and cared for : Laurie, his baby sister. For years, Dr. Sam Loomis tried to cure him, realizing soon it was hopeless, that Michael was pure evil and nothing would change about it. Then arrives another October. Michael is now 27 years old, the former fair-haired kid became a huge man... A 6'10-tall killing machine who escapes and goes back home. Back to Haddonfield. Back to Laurie. Now, all he needs for trick or treat with his baby sister is a sharp kitchen knife, a pair of mechanics' coveralls and an old white-faced mask. And this time, Halloween can really begin.
Interested? You don't have to wait long. The movie releases in the U.S. on August 31, 2007. Check out the movie's website for some kickass looking photos from the movie and the trailer is there as well.

Eye Candy of the Day...



Brought to you by Natalie Gulbis, who won her First LPGA event today. Congrats, Hotty McHotface.

Quote of the Day...

"To live is to solve problems. That's the definition of everything… Leaves are stretching out for light because that's their problem… Ants move dirt because that's their problem… Flowers are bright not for lovers, but because they have problems…."

~Written by Charles Mudede for the Movie, Police Beat

My Desk is Not Your Office...

My desk space is, quite literally, MY DESK SPACE. I am very protective of my personal space and do not enjoy when it is invaded by anyone. I take this as a personal insult. If I can hear the breath coming out of your nostrils, see the pores on your skin, feel any breeze cross my body because of your movements, then you are way too fucking close. It would be prudent for you to ask if you may use a small (and I do mean small-minuscule-tiny-ency weensy) portion of said desk to quickly write something down on a piece of paper. However. My Pen is not yours to borrow. I do not trust that you have washed your hands in the last 60 seconds, let alone at any point throughout the day. I feel safe to assume that anyone that Looks like they do not wash after dropping a wreaking load in a toilet Does Not follow through on any Fast-food joint's urgings that Employee's Wash Hands before returning to Work. Yes, they are there for the employees, but do not think for a second that they are not there to guilt you into being hygienic.

To Clarify: Stay away from my desk you cheese-smelling-dirt-covered-heavy-breathing-stiff-necked-monkey-nut-piss-drinking-liver-lipped-fuck.

The paper, however, is pretty much free to anyone who wants it.

Damn You, Frustration!

The thing I hate about working very closely to a bunch of girls around my age is that I want to have sex with a lot of them. Especially one that I found out likes The Simpsons, South Park, Family Guy, video games, drinking, and everything else I want in a girl...and she's hot, to boot. Holy hell I need some sexin'!


So, after that, I leave you with this:
From Maxim:



















I hope she's the next Bond girl. Oh please, God, let this happen!

Its Letters like this...

That make me want to work for The Stranger:

"Dear Mr. Editor,

Can I please ask everyone to please desist in putting on good 21+ concerts in the Seattle area? I think I speak for the entire under 21 crowd when I say it's just getting really annoying not being able to go and see my favorite band because you feel the need to get drunk while you rock out. Seriously, is booze really important enough to you people for you to deny the amazing memories of a Clap Your Hands Say Yeah concert ON HIS BIRTHDAY to a 14-year-old-boy? Why don't you just order a vodka and children's tears at your 21+ Brian Jonestown Massacre concert? Because otherwise mine will just go to waste.

Thank you for hearing out my request,

Preston, 14"

My absolute favorite part? Vodka and children's tears. Expect me to start incorporating it into my everyday life. Bitches.

What Makes a Good Band?

In my humble opinion...

What I've realized about bands who I love, and whose live shows rock, is that one strict pattern emerges for me: I like bands that write great albums, that are always different from their last, and yet when you listen to them in concert they can tie every song together in a different way so that the music sounds no less cohesive and consistent.

All of the bands (who I've seen or heard live) in my top 10(11) list are like this. And that is just so damn impressive to me.

Bar Talk: Top 10 Favorite Bands of All Time

OK I know I'm way late but... I'm bored

Honorable Mentions
(To clarify this, I think all of these bands are amazing, but I'm reserving the top 10 for bands that I know most/all of their music and that I listen to continuously)
in no particular order:
The Beatles
Pink Floyd
Queen
Gorillaz
BT
Smashing Pumpkins
Silverchair
Minus the Bear
Ben Folds Five
Elliot Smith
Rufus Wainwright
Count Zero
(I know there's a lot, shut up!)

And NOW
the top 10





#11 Brand New - WHAT?! Mark's not allowed to do a top 11 is he?!?!?! Well here's the deal - in honesty, I listen to #11 more than I do #10 because I truly am a child of the nineties, but I strongly believe #10 is a better band. So that's how I justify it. Anyway...

#11 Brand New - I don't venture into the emo realm very often, but Brand New is a notable exception. Their lyrical ability shines on the band's second release, Deja Entendu, which proved that emo doesn't all have to be about crying over a break-up. Some song subjects range from a guy seducing a drunk girl in the wonderfully creepy "Me vs Maradona vs Elvis", to the loss of innocence in "Sic Transit Gloria: Glory Fades". Especially notable is their ability to write varied, accessible music. They're just an overall great band.
Favorite Song: Okay, I Believe You But My Tommy Gun Don't

#10 Led Zepplin - Hearing live recordings of them is just unbelievable. Their music defined a generation and influenced probably thousands of musicians afterwards. Never since Led Zepplin can we truly say that we gave the world rock gods. They weren't afraid to push the envelope, with songs ranging from the slow, introspective "No Quarter" to the epic "Achilles Last Stand" to the bluesy "Dazed and Confused. They could do it all - and that's exactly what they did.
Favorite Song: Kashmir

#9 Beck - From the moment I heard his first popular single, the mopey "Loser", I knew I would be a fan. Beck's music is everywhere, used as transition music on radio stations, in television specials, commercials - and the best part about that? His music has not suffered for commercial success. His singles are staples on most major radio stations, like "Where It's At", "The New Pollution", "Sexx Laws", "Beautiful Way", "E-Pro", "Devil's Haircut" - and the list goes on and on. Able to produce incresingly unique albums, while still keeping his trademark sound, Beck is liable to be around for a while. Also he uses crazy puppets in his live show. It is nuts.
Favorite Song: Get Real Paid

#8 The Mars Volta - This band is basically what you get when you combine punk, psychadelic, progressive rock, and a complete loss of grip on reality. Despite the difficult time one has understanding their lyrics (seeing as how they speak a mixed-up, schizophrenic version of English), their albums are always thought provoking, and follow a concept that people devote entire websites to translating from Mars Volta-speak to normal English. Having seen them live, they know how to put on a great show, love to jam and use obscene numbers of people to participate in the dense music making.
Favorite Song: Viscera Eyes

#7 DJ Shadow - Trip-Hop legend DJ Shadow is a force to behold when you see him live - emplosive and trippy images accompany his unbelievable turntable abilities. He is able to seamlessly integrate portions from certain tracks into others to give each live show a complete unique sound. Everything he attaches his name to is thought out from the first second to the last, and it's impossible to hear his music and not want to dance. I also include UNKLE's first album under this number, because 90% of it is courtesy of Shadow.
Favorite Song: The Number Song

#6 Nine Inch Nails - It is almost unfair for me to put this band on this list considering I only got into them less than a week ago, but it's honestly like this band is an addiction of mine. I have already bought three albums, and plan to buy the others soon. Every dark, grinding, emotional song gets into my head so intensely that I feel like my thoughts sound differently now. The music is so beautiful in its own unique way. Trent Reznor's ability to create a cohesive album is unparalleled, and I think that "The Downward Spiral" and "The Fragile" are the greatest concept albums I've ever heard. Bonus points for sheer musicality, using rhythms and tone colors Stravinsky would have envied. Give me a few months and this band may even move up a few spots...
Favorite Song: The Fragile

#5 Umphrey's McGee - In my opinion, the undisputed kings of the jam music scene. With hundreds of songs in their repertoire of original material, and another couple hundred covers, of everything from the Beatles to Toto to Smashing Pumpkins. They tour pretty much constantly throughtout the year, generally playing two to four hours of sweeping jams and mind-boggling guitar solos. They never play the same show twice, and every show is a completely different experience to the listener. Their studio albums, though underappreciated compared to their live act, are all tight and varied, with a great usage of the benefits of the studio.
Favorite Song: Bright Lights, Big City

#4 311 - Another band you just can't help but dance to. Their live show is awesome, their music is fun and funny, and every track across their eight major albums is amazing, and they have experienced basically no dip in popularity since their first big release almost fifteen years ago. Their singles are known my pretty much everyone everywhere, and they are known for their catchy infectious riffs. Can't wait to see them in a few weeks!
Favorite Song: Omaha Stylee

#3 Incubus - Another band on my list which went through a big change throughout their career, from their Primus-inspired roots to the pop-rock stardom they've achieved today. Incubus became a household name after their release of the single "Pardon Me", and since then have been dominating alternative radio stations with each release. The concert we attanded last thursday was absolutely unbelievable, busting out basically whatever they wanted from their whole career, including some amazing, guitar heavy songs from "A Crow Left of the Murder" along with their new favorites "Anna Molly" and "Dig". Brandon Boyd sings like an angel and is also hot as hell and likes to take his shirt off. :)
Favorite Song: Just a Phase

#2 Muse - Finally having shucked the critics' beliefs of being Radiohead wannabes, with their newest cd, Muse is basically on top of the world. They have had 15 singles on four albums, and are currently wowing crowds with their high impact live show. Their music is like minimalism meets angry rock. Especially on their sophomore release "Origin of Symmetry", lead singer Matt Bellamy is not afraid to scream and wail, in complete contrast to his normal vocal crooning or ridiculously high melodies (that rival even Freddie Mercury's range). Owing to their recent success, they have already announced a return to the studio for a new album, probably due out late next year. Thank God.
Favorite Song: Space Dementia

#1 Radiohead - are my idols. They have continuously reinvented themselves with cds that range from poppy acoustic songs to full blown techno, and yet when you hear them scroll through their repertoire in concert, they are so consistent in their sound that you'd never question that the songs belong to different genres. Thom Yorke sings amazingly, and there is not a track they've released (since their questionable premiere album, Pablo Honey) that I do not have the utmost respect for. This review also includes Thom Yorke's "The Eraser", which although is not part of the band's repertoire, still shares a lot of similarity with their b-sides.
Favorite Song: How To Disappear Completely

Back to the Future...Again!

No, the movie isn't being remade. This is all about bringing back the true icon of the film, the DeLorean. I love that car and I want one. Sure it was slow as hell and weighs a couple of tons, but damn, it's a sweet looking car.

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Quote of the Day

"You ever try going mad without power? It's boring. No one listens to you."
-Russ Cargill, "The Simpsons Movie"

Movie Review of the Week: The Simpsons Movie


This is the movie I've been waiting for for 18 years. I have been a fan of "The Simpsons" since it started, even though I was only 4. I have seen every episode (well at least up to season 15 because after that I either worked every Sunday night or maybe it's because the show lost a bit of it's awesomeness) and know probably more than I should about the show. Which brings me to my review. The movie starts off with some classic Itchy and Scratchy moments, but to my surprise, there was no blood. There was lots of violence but no blood. How is that possible, in THE Simpsons movie, to have the most violent characters not even shed an ounce of blood? Despite the lack of that red fluid, it was still a great open, especially when out of nowhere the movie opens in much of the same fashion of the show. It was a perfect homage to the show's opening.

The plot of the movie has Springfield becoming the most polluted city in the country, all thanks to Homer of course, which leads the head of the EPA to seal off Springfield in a giant glass dome and it's all up to the Simpson family to save their beloved city. While the plot is absolutely ludicrous, I expected nothing less from a Simpsons storyline.

Sadly, many of the movie's funniest parts were shown in the trailers, so seeing them weren't as funny as they should have been. Except, many of those parts were extended upon very well, especially the scene with Bart skateboarding naked. That scene is very well crafted and cleverly executed and as long as you don't blink, you'll be shown a very special surprise. There were also a vast amount of hilarious one-liners that are a staple of the show and very well placed in the movie.

The thing that bothered me the most is that the animation in some spots was of poor quality for a big movie. Granted, the movie's animation is better than the show's animation (which it should be), but there were some parts that just seemed like they didn't put enough effort into the background as they did everything else. This is only a minor setback though and doesn't detract from the movie very much.

"The Simpsons Movie," I believe, is a fitting tribute to the show's wonder years, mostly because almost everything is unexpected. Marge gets serious, Bart wants to become a Flanders, Lisa falls in love, Maggie seems like she has super powers and Homer gets his ass kicked over and over while messing up everyone's life, but you still end up loving him as you should. Also, Homer gives the bird to the entire city. How awesome is that? Everything just seems to work, which is why I give "The Simpsons Movie" an 8 out of 10.