Showing posts with label Drinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Drinking. Show all posts

Friday, March 6, 2009

R.I.P. Wild Bills



The bar that has given me many drunk nights and has hosted infamous "Day before Thanksgiving" parties, has officially closed it's doors. No notice was given to pretty much anybody. It had a waterpipe burst and, I'm going to assume, too much money was required to fix it.

We did a cheers to the memory of Wild Bills and all the good times we've had. We'll miss you Bills.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Demotivational Poster

I found this online and found it really funny:


Monday, December 29, 2008

A Look Back at 2008

2008 is almost over, and it definitely has been a mixed bag.

There has been many good things to come out of it. I graduated...finally. Didn't get a job anywhere near my major, BUT I found a job. With these days, that's a great thing. I also found out that I can write off a bunch of stuff and get a huge return on my taxes (not for this year, obviously, but still great nonetheless).

There have been a couple of bad decisions, to say the least. First bad decision of 2008 for me...deciding to lease a car, instead of buying one. When I first got it, it seemed like a good idea. Then I got a job that requires me to travel thousands of miles per month. Now, within 8 months I put on 15,000 miles. Oops. The second bad decision was probably my choice to by a Mac. I don't have any problems with it and it is very fast, BUT everything I need to do on a computer for work involves mostly PC applications. I kinda wish I made that decision after I got the job. I personally don't see what's so good about Macs. They function properly and all, but they have a steep learning curve and I think, overall, I like PCs better. But that's just me. The 3rd one, which is the cheapest (maybe..haha) was allowing this one girl to slip through my fingers.

Oh well. That was 2008. I'm ready for 2009! I'm starting it off right, with a concert (maybe party) in Chicago, with one of my best friends. There could be more people there, but all of you suck.

Hope everyone has a drunk, safe, sex-filled, grape-eating, caber-tossing, pile-driving, beer pong throwing, champagne drinking, money making, drug taking, dance-filled, super-power having, great time on New Years Eve.

Smell Ya Later!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Quick Math Problem

(Don't worry its multiple choice)

X-Mas Time + Me + JCottonmouth + Hock + Rambo + The Biz + Doodlepoops - Claudio + Bar = ?

a.) xmastimemejottonmothhockrmbothebzodepoopsbar
b.) the best idea ever
c.) the worst idea ever
d.) impossible to pull off
e.) happening ASAP

Choose wisely....

But seriously, bar tonight (Tuesday)?

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thankful Givings

Happy Thanksgiving, Mother-Clusters!

I hope your days are wonderful with your families everybody.

Some thoughts:
Last night was fuckin' awesome! At the bar, we all got super gay and wouldn't have had it any other way. It was nice to see all my far-away friends: The Biz, B-Don, and even Kiznox (who really shouldn't and WON'T be a "far-away friend" anymore). After the bar, JCottonmouth, Hock, Kiznox all went to JC's house to after-partay...and who should show up, but Geggles and Justine Luttrell! So at two in the morning, a second round of awesome started. After putzing around for a while (and Kiznox passing out, and Hock taking him home) we decided to head into the hot tub, which is exactly what the doctor ordered. It was so relaxing...and plus Justine is super hot in a "bathing suit". So after an hour or so in the jacuzzi, we pulled our pruney selves out of the hot water and directly into the snow covered outside hell. We dried off and we went our separate ways. And I finally arrived home at 5:45 am. So I would like to THANK all of you for GIVING me a great night. (Double pun?)

And today the fun doesn't stop. Marky is having dinner with my family and later Claudio, Gegs, Justine, and possibly Hock are coming over to hang out after dinner! Fuck yeah!

Peace and Love, (Cluster) fuckers.

**Hope you all get super fat today!**

Friday, June 27, 2008

The NHL Playoffs

I know that it is a bit late for all of this but watching it on YouTube again and again never gets old so I felt the need to post my experience.

Hockey has become much more fun for me over the past year, especially has been helped by the Red Wings winning the Stanley Cup this year. However, the Wings winning the Cup has been just a footnote compared to the experience that was had by all who celebrated throughout the playoffs. Let me tell you the story so that you feel the joy and angst that was these playoffs.

Rick, Justin, Josh, and I (Biz was there for some, not all) enjoyed the entirety of the NHL playoffs together at our local "watering hole." What started with the Nashville Predators and ended with the Pittsburgh Penguins become a great time had by all. We would get together for almost any playoff game throughout the month or two that is the NHL playoffs. We would stay up as long as it took (sometimes very late) to watch the Red Wings move their way through the competition. I was priveliged enough to go to the Red Wings vs. Avalance Game 1 at the Joe and watch that fantastic game in person. I was hooked after that and we watched every game together as though we were the ones out on the ice. Once we got to the Stanley Cup Finals against Pittsburgh is when we really had our fun.

The first two games won easily by Detroit has us betting as to how far the series would actually go, but we found out that Pittsburgh has life after winning Game 3. Detroit took Game 4 and it looked like the Stanley Cup would make an appearance at the Joe on that fateful Monday night...but it was not to be had. 1 am rolled around and the Triple OT goal was scored by Pittsburgh, despite the lingering headache that was the following morning at work, without the Red Wings even having the audacity to win the game, we felt that they had won in Pittsburgh once, they could do it again.

Game 6, Detroit leads 3-1 with 1:30 to go, when Pittsburgh scores to make it 3-2...my heart can't take this shit. As the seconds tick away towards the end of the game Josh, Rick and I are watching on one TV literally one arm around another while the clock brings Stanley closer and closer to home...the clock hits 0.00...joy and ecstacy fills the room...we scream, holler and jump around in a cluster of humanity as we celebrate what has come to be a wonderful time for the city of Detroit, but even more importantly a great time celebrated by the group that has watched them get to this point. Words cannot begin to tell you how great of a feeling it was to be able to celebrate such an accomplishment that, even though we had no physical part in, felt like something we had earned together.

It is a moment that will live in my memory as a time that was celebrated as a group, that was something we could appreciate together (the last time the Wings won the Cup I wasn't all that into hockey) and made all the late nights worth while. The Red Wings won the Stanley Cup but what I will really remember it as the day that we erupted into celebration together.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

So this idea that I had is pretty fuckin' sweet...

And its an idea for a drinking game.

(Yes, apartment dwellers, I know that you know about this game. So now you know that I know that you know about this new game, please still feel free to chip in your two cents.)

Okay. So this idea came to me when I was searching through the movie titles at my parents house after my sister asked me to pick a movie. I was not in the mood to watch a movie because I knew that we would be leaving soon so I decided to name off porn versions of every actual movie.

I figure that we are all clever enough to come up with something within 3-5 seconds. So the deal would be that you lose points for every second after the 5th until you figure out a title. Each lost point would be a drink. So I will hereafter refer to "points" as "drinks". See a problem, fix a problem.

The way that you would win drinks would be something-along-the-lines-of-but-not-necessarily-the-same-as this:

Using innuendo without making the film NC-17 (This one is totally up for interpretation. It could become more along the lines of: a really shitty/unfunny version of whatever porn name you come up with.) = 1 drink to pass (which will hereafeter be referred to as "DP")
Involving Sexual Devices such as Dildos or Fake Vaginas = 2 DP's
Naming Actual Sexual Acts = 5 DP's

**Bonus Films**
These are films that already sound like filthy, dirty, ridiculously funny porn. Films like, "Hot Rod" or "Fun with Dick and Jane" or "Black Snake Moan" or "The Vagina Monologues".
Okay, so the way that one would get points on these movies would be by coming up with a fake plotline for the movie, but also making it a porno. Get it? Right? I am telling you, this could be phenomenally fun! These would be worth double the DP's! (you would recieve double time as well)

Oh, and I thought of adding one more Bonus Card. So you would get this card, right, and it would say something like "Backdoor Blonde Slutfest 69" or "Candy Girls 9". (I think I have that last one...hahaha) and you would have to figure out a way to make that correct for censors. That would be a really difficult one so it would be worth triple the DP's! (you would recieve triple time as well)

So yeah...that is the game. The winner is the one who isn't dead. Suggestions? Wanna play? Got an idea for a name?

Thursday, December 6, 2007

I Do it Too...


But, lets face it...we all do it, to some extent.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Life Is Not Worth Living Anymore...

Because I can't drink Miller Lite! So, apparently I'm allergic to whatever they use to make Miller Lite. Over the past couple of weeks I have been getting sicker and sicker every time I drink Miller Lite. This makes me incredibly sad, seeing as how that is my favorite domestic beer. Damn you, allergies!

Sunday, October 7, 2007

I Love My...

...Cocktail Shaker.

My mixed drinks are so delicious now.

Perfectly chilled

Totally mixed

Just the right amount of water from the ice

It's like a veritable alcohol orgasm.

So the question is:

When are y'all gonna come down here so I can make delicious cocktails for you? :)

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Stressful

So I have a music history test tomorrow... sick. If only the music from gregorian chant through late medieval times meant shit to me, or was something I cared about. Also keep your fingers crossed that my car makes it all the way to and from Michigan... why do you guys all have to live so far away anyway? ;) I can't WAIT to party on thursday night - get the gang together and such. And considering it's tuesday and I've already worked 14 hours since sunday, not including school, I could really use a break. the people at my job are always snapping and stressed out- for no good reason. The job can be a little stressful, but seriously it's not nearly as bad as they act. If you do something wrong, or if something doesn't go according to plan, it's fine! That's why we do rehearsals. You tell me, and we'll fix it. Responses like "well we move these to help you, so you shouldn't complain" are so unnecessary. Especially when your reasoning is because you have so much to get done during intermission (which is 15 minutes by the way), and I find you sitting doing nothing when I get over there two seconds later. Whatever. Not to toot my horn, but I'm a good employee and I just get stuff done when it needs to be done. And I let people know politely when I could use their assistance, and sometimes they just take it as a personal attack - I'm talking to YOU girl on stage left crew who thinks she's the shit!
End rant. I need to get to MI. Especially to get fo'd up with my good friends. :)
Cottonmouth signing out.

ps Cottonmouth is a badass nickname in its own right as well. rock

Monday, September 3, 2007

So here's what I'm thinking...

This is mainly for Hock and Kiznox
I will be in Michigan on thursday, 9/20 for the STS9 concert (which, by the way Hock, you should also come to). I have to be back in IN for class at 2:30 the next day (sick, but that's life). So after the concert, we should party it up. Get the girls and Scotty to come by, get shitfaced, and then I'll leave in the morning. I figure it's really the only option considering how short of a time I'll be in MI. Besides, you know, not drinking. But is that really an option? I didn't think so.

So let me know soon! Let's get good and drunk!

Monday, August 20, 2007

Fuck Yeah IU

Well gents, it's official. My school parties harder than yours. So although I will be visiting Michigan whenever I can, this leads me to one obvious conclusion:

You guys need to come here so we can get FUCKED UP!!!

I leave you with Champagne Stevens and Toilet McGroo:

Camp Bisco VI: A Weekend in Review

I was intending on including some pics with this... but alas, I think my camera must have fallen out in doug or dave's car... anyway though

So although I have been to Bonnaroo three times now, it was hard to know what to expect from this weekend. Very few bands I knew, and only one band I'm really into, in addition to the fact that none of us going had any idea of what to expect since we have never been to anything besides the 'roo. Coupled with the fact that I had spent money I didn't have on this festival and would not be returning until late at night the day before my theory placement exam, I did not think it was going to be a great experience.

I could not have possibly been further from the truth.

This was, bar none, the best concert experience of my life, and I'm going to do my best to try to explain to you all the wonder that was Bisco 2007.

We arrived at the Indian Lookout Country Club at around 1:00 in the afternoon to be greeted by short lines (reason #1 this was better than b-roo) and one of the most lax security checks I've ever seen. Essentially they just wanted to make sure nobody had nitrous or glass - but they didn't check very hard since they checked inside my backpack and didn't notice Thumper in the front pocket. We received a welcome letter from the management of the country club, which it turns out, is a bunch of bikers (which explained the fact that all of the security guys sported grizzly beards and bandanas. The welcome essentially said that bikers understand how easy it is to be stereotyped and how they were happy to provide a place for us to congregate, and said if we didn't get it right this year, they'd keep inviting us back til we did. Oh also the letter expressly stated that no cops would be on the premises. We parked our cars right by the children's section, which was initially a little disconcerting, but there were like 2 kids there out of 6000 people. We were maybe a half mile from the main stage, and about 200 yards from the side stage, which allowed us to listen to bands while just at our campsite.

We then began preparing for that evening's Umphrey's Concert. Namely by drinking a shit ton of gin and tonic and smoking a bit. We went to the concert, where we were pleased to find ample room to jam out and NO SECURITY WHATSOEVER. All they said was not to bring cans onto the field. Umphrey's put on an amazing show, by far the danciest grooves I've heard them play, in addition to playing their new song "wizard burial ground" - my new fav song of theirs. I drank way too much for this concert, danced like a fool, and promptly passed out in a chair at our campsite, before moving at some point to the inside of doug's backseat, on top of all of our cargo. Sadly, my passing out caused me to miss the Infected Mushroom concert, but I heard it wasn't as good as some of their others, so life goes on. It cooled off considerably, and I eventually climbed in the tent with Dave and Jess.

The next day was very windy, but once the sun was shining it was wonderful. We threw the frisbee around for a bit and listened to some of Indobox and King Britt (both phenomenal concerts). I pause in the story here for a moment to explain something about myself. I have a lot of trouble enjoying myself at concerts where I don't know the band. Sure, going to 311, Incubus, Muse or Radiohead is always gonna be awesome for me, because I will probably recognize 96% of what they play. But usually at concerts where I don't know the artists as well, I get bored and tired - even at my first umphrey's concert I had trouble with this. However, every concert I saw this weekend that I say I like immediately was totally accessible to me, and insanely fun to go to. I listened to Holy Fuck for a short time and came back to the camp to partake in some fungus digestion. We went to STS9's PA set, a band who I saw for the first time at Bonnaroo this year. It was well worth the trip to see them again (haha, get it? trip?). As my regular world dissolved away I was pleased to hear new versions of some favorites from the previous concerts, as well as some groovy new tunes I couldn't help myself but to dance my ass off to. I sat for a moment to look at clouds with Jess, but that was too intense and I just kept bursting out laughing hysterically at the way they pixellated and morphed unnaturally across the sky. By the end of the concert all four of us were out of our minds, and we returned to the campsite.

Shortly after STS9, the psy-trance group Hallucinogen started playing at the main stage. I listened for 4 songs or so at the camp, and I enjoyed it so much that I became very concerned that when the next band started at the side stage, it would hurt my ability to enjoy Hallucinogen. After much debating, I went it alone to the concert (after sitting back down again deciding I would stay, and then after listening again for a few seconds, immediately standing up and saying "no way, I'm going"). I'm going to set aside the next comment for dramatic effect.

It was the best concert of my life.

I creeped closer and closer to the stage throughout the concert, drawn almost hypnotically to the sounds. Their music went from being slow and calm, to sick grooves, to fast paced industrial type dance music, and everything was executed with the type of perfection that I wish EVERY band could achieve. Simon Posford (the head of Hallucinogen, and almost a member of Shpongle) is a genius. The music was also abound with ethnic sounds, especially wonderful Indian voices which only added to the trip. I danced like a fool some more, all the while considering going back, but finding it simply impossible to tear myself away. It began getting a little chillier so I put back on the shirt and jacket I had shucked earlier (putting on the shirt was a joke - I had no idea what I was doing and couldn't find the right holes, so I kinda made an ass of myself, but I don't think anyone around me was with it enough to care).

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a freak wind came careening from behind the stage bringing with it a downpour I had never experienced at a concert, especially in the state I was. The winds honestly must have hit 40 or 50 mph easily, as they RIPPED STRAIGHT THROUGH THE TAPESTRIES HANGING ON EITHER SIDE OF THE STAGE (that's cloth, mind you - and they were like 100 feet tall each). I stayed at the concert to the bitter end, amid cries of "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON???" and "Where the FUCK did this fucking COME FROM?!?!?!" It had now dropped about thirty or forty degrees in a matter of fifteen minutes, and I wandered, cold, wet and disoriented back to the campsite, where I found Jess in the middle of a bad trip (probably more spurred by stress and anxiety than by the actual drugs). We listened to the Disco Biscuits play from the safety of David's car, and at their set break, another of Posford's projects "Shpongle" played. Although there were certainly differences between it and Hallucinogen, the same knack for combining world sounds with blisteringly fast beats was present, and I found myself shaking my ass in the car with the music. We all stayed there til morning.

The next morning was almost unbearably cold, so I read some Harry Potter til a little after noon, still under a blanket in the car. Eventually, the sun warmed things up a little bit, so it was time to start drinking again. After I got really drunk again, we went to see Bustle in your Hedgerow, a jamming Led Zeppelin cover band, who were, not surprisingly, amazing. I began drinking again after the concert to ensure that I would be really wasted for STS9's live set that night. As a brief adventure by myself, I went to see Bassnectar, a really fucking awesome DJ who largely made remixes of popular songs - his dance-y "Strawberry Fields" was amazing. STS9 that night was again, incredible, although a much different experience since I was drunk this time.

And I danced like a fool before going to bed again.

We left early the next morning, amid a lot of drama, but I don't need to go into that here.



In short, I had truly the time of my life. I never though this type of essentially Electronic festival could appeal to me, and it was truly an unreal experience. I would go again in a heartbeat, and unless Bonnaroo's lineup is unmissable next year (we'll see who headlines), I would probably be more likely to look for smaller festivals like this.

Friday, August 17, 2007

Want to know your BAC?

I found several ways to calculate your Blood Alcohol Content quick and effectively. I learned a few new things too.

Here is a chart and a funny quote on the page from George Carlin saying "One tequila, two tequila, three tequlia, floor."

Go University of Oklahoma Police Department, what a marvelous idea. Only in college right?

A lot of website names are cool. This one is called intox.com so it takes the cake.

Just a quick overview since I heard about a person with a BAC of at least 0.45 (pretty near deathly).

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Artists are crazy fuckers

Once again, artists are crazy fuckers. He also must be an alcoholic.

In the spirit of comedy...

I have decided that I am in a marvelously funny mood today...don't ask why...but in the spirit of that I have decided that I am going to put up a huge list of some of my favorite jokes from some of my favorite comedians!

Lewis Black:

Behind me, I heard a young woman of 25 say, "If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college." Now, I'm gonna repeat that, because it bears repeating. "If it weren't for my horse..." as in, giddyup, giddyup, let's go — "I wouldn't have spent that year in college," which is a degree-granting institution. Don't think about that too long, or BLOOD will shoot out your NOSE!

The Republicans are the party of bad ideas. The Democrats are the party of no ideas.

In my lifetime, we've gone from Eisenhower to George W. Bush. We've gone from John F. Kennedy to Al Gore. If this is evolution, I believe that in 12 years, we'll be voting for plants.

Rodney Dangerfield:

In the school I went to, they asked a kid to prove the law of gravity and he threw the teacher out of the window.

My wife was afraid of the dark...then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light.

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much...way to much. My doctor drew blood and he ran a tab.

Bill Cosby:

I am not the boss of my house. I don't know when I lost it. I don't know if I ever had it. But I have seen the boss's job and I do not want it.

My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!

Don't worry about senility," my grandfather used to say. "When it hits you, you won't know it.

Fathers are the geniuses of the house because only a person as intelligent as we could fake such stupidity. Think about your father: He doesn't know where anything is. You ask him to do something, he messes it up, and your mother sends you: "Go down and see what your father's doing before he blows up the house." He's a genius at work because he doesn't want to do it, and knows someone will be coming soon to stop him from doing it.

For good measure (and because I'm a big drinker) I decided to throw some drinking quotes on there here as well:

A man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink. (W.C. Fields)

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and that's the best they're going to feel all day. (Dean Martin)

The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job. But if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house. (Jeff Foxworthy)

I don't have a drinking problem. I drink, I get drunk, I fall down. No problem.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

I love it!

We were just talking about this the other day while partying it up...Hock this one is for you!

I honestly don't know what to think about the new host of the "Price is Right" but I will say at least it wasn't Rosie. I've always liked Drew Carey and I think he's just a clown enough to pull off warranting the zany t-shirts and crazy college kids that Bob Baker did. Time will tell just how this will work out but, as I said a few months ago when I learner Barker was retiring, I wanted the show to go down with him because I'd hate to see such a classic show crash and burn like so many others that lost their original host...and in turn their audience.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Lohan in Hot Water...Again

This should come as no surprise, seeing that Lindsay Lohan is a druggy and an alcoholic, she got charged with a DUI. While searching her car, they also found cocaine. It's good to see that the rehab is working well. Mug shot included

Monday, July 23, 2007

I think this is a "post" but I could be wrong

I know what you're thinking...of course this is called a post, what else would it be called? How about informational delivery? Well this argument does not constitute one that plagues our society...at least not according to Ed Anger who chimes in by ummm..."expressing the way it may be or the way someone wishes it could be, so they don't sue us or suffer psychological impairment" or, as most of us would say, "telling it like it is."

Things like that drive you to drink sometimes eh? Well how do you feel about Miller Chill? I didn't think so...and neither does this guy.

Also if you've had a few too many of those Miller Chills (God help you) or any of those girly beers (Woodchuck or Honey Brown) or any other manly beer (Labatt Blue, Miller Lite, etc.) than you may have experienced what us professional drinkers call a "hangover." I know, they blow ass (sometimes literally) but would you like to know what to do to either prevent or deal with it AND laugh a little along the way? Yes? Good, take a look at this website which is just another reason I love the internet.

Earlier, Kiznox gave us a look at the Top 10 Superhero Villian costumes but if you want another list that I'm sure you will have some qualms about take a look at this list of the Top 20 All-Time Best Cartoon Characters (I love how that badass kid Stewie Griffin gets listed five higher than Peter).

A final note, congratulations go out to Padraig Harrington for his win today at the Open Championship at Carnoustie, Scotland! This is Harrington's first major and it comes after he defeats fellow European Sergio Garcia in the four-hole playoff format after Garcia missed about a six foot putt that would've won the tournament on the 18th hole. This is Harrington's first major victory adding to a year of first year Major Championship winners (American Zach Johnson at the Masters and Argentinian Angel Cabrera at the U.S. Open).