The Weekly WYR

That's right folks it is time once again, thanks to College Humor, that we look at those frightening decisions that affect us everyday of our lives...or not. It's all in good fun but let's see what questions are posed this week in this fun theoretical activity.

Would you rather...

Never use the internet again or never watch TV again?

Oh man...that is a toughy but I have GOT to go internet because, even though you are still sitting in front of an inanimate object, TV is where it's at. I LOVE to watch sports games, especially football, and I did not have TV to show me the magical sports games, as well as my favorite shows (as seen in a previous post). I would miss sites like myspace and, more importantly, this website because without it you would not be getting the self proclaimed "clusterfuck" of information you so desperately crave!

Be stuck in an elevator for 24 hours after an important job interview, or miss the bus and never make it in the first place?

I'm going to have to say that I would never make it in the first place because jobs do come and go but that would be a horrible experience...especially knowing me that I would get hungry, become exceedingly stressed out, my phone would not get service to chat with people to pass the time, I'd want to smoke like a chimney but would probably only have like one cigarette left, and I would get very lonely with no iPod or anything to keep me entertained. I would probably be so very bored that even masturbation would get boring...that is what truly scares me in the end...think of it! Oh the humanity...

Be an unknown minor league baseball player or a famous professional badminton star?

Oh God why would I ever want to be around the sport of badminton let alone be known famous for it? Eff that! I have no need nor want for the lack of privacy that results from being famous.

Hook up with Becky from "Full House" or the mom from "Step by Step"?

I always liked Lori Loughlin more than I did Suzanne Somers plus Full House was better so Somers, being 0-2, strikes out after you look at the fact she is a little too old for me because Somers graduated high school the year Loughlin was BORN! Yeah, no thanks.

Have an limitless supply of money but it'd have to all be in change or get 100,000 dollars every year for life?

I have enough change as it is because I hate carrying change with me therefore it would lead to great annoyance if I had to carry all my money as change when I could get 100,000 a year for the rest of my life! That is more money that I could probably know what to do with after a while without having to deal with the all that fucking change!

Fart out of your mouth or urinate out of your tear ducts?

Gross either way but urinating out of your tear ducts? Fuck that shit...good God that would suck. Think of it this way...burps could be compared to little loud farts so really what is changing? Not much, just the semantics of it.