Why New Orleans Needs Batman...

Think about it. Here we have a city, New Orleans, literally drowning in tragedy. Katrina wiped out a huge portion of the businesses in the area, people fled, looting was fierce. Hell, the one place that people were told to go for shelter from the storm was a complete cesspool of abuse, rape allegations, violence. In essence, the place where people were sent to get a reprieve from the disaster going on in their city was nothing more than a confined hell for many people.

Stories in the news around the time of the hurricane read more fearsome than most stories coming out of The Big Easy. In a town known for little more than Jambalaya and Mardi Gras, shit is really starting to hit the fan.

Batman needs to save this city much like he needs to save Gotham. You could argue that there are currently no main players in the villain category, that most of Batman's work would be pummeling street thugs and thieves. True....but where do the greatest enemies rise from? If you said the buzz surrounding a truly unique hero, then you are correct. Hell, sometimes the villain can already be there, but it takes a true hero to bring them to the forefront.

The biggest villains in the city may already be there. It would seem, what with the latest autopsy report stating that even the police cannot be trusted not to murder citizens, that people are getting desperate. And what do desperate times call for? Thats right. Batman.

In most Batman comics, and cartoons, and movies, crime takes a steady dip once a major villain arrives on the scene. Yes, this IS Actually true. Of course, many thugs and goons become the army of the villain. Yet, isnt that what we would want for this city so ravaged by crime? Right now, New Orleans is on track to become the murder capital of the nation. This is a feat that the city has been seemingly working toward well before Katrina.

Lets take a look at the similarities between the recent Batman adaptation, played sexily by Christian Bale. Take a look at the Plot line.

City becomes wrought with debauchery. Raj Agool, (or however the fuck you spell that) attempts to tear city apart economically. Fails due to Wayne family. Bruce goes all full of revenge after his parents are murdered and gets all "learn the mind of a criminal". Then learns kung-fu from Raj Agool, not knowing that it was him who tried to take city down in the first place. Bruce returns to Gotham years later to unleash a little justice-filled-vengeance on the city's criminals. Becomes Batman. Becomes The Dark Knight. Becomes a Hero. Raj Agool again decides that Gotham is fucking wacked out and attempts to destroy all of the cities water pipes and unleash a "fear" poison. Batman totally kicks his ass.

Now lets take a quick peak at the city of New Orleans.

City becomes wrought with debauchery. Corrupt city officials, (mayor and police) begin to tear the city apart economically. A rash of unwarranted arrests, the helping of business developers to kick out many residents, the complete and total lack of monitoring on the city's spending, and absolutely zero cash being spent on the levies. However, the Saints begin to do well, and Mardi Gras starts bringing in record numbers of tourists. Then, in a similarly eerie water related incident, hurricane Katrina rolls across much of the south, but doing an incredibly large amount of damage to this city.

It would seem that in both accounts, the effective doomsday weapon involves water. With Batman around, the devastation was kept to a minimum. In New Orleans, it is only by sheer luck that the entire city was not destroyed. So here we are, sitting on potential with what used to be an amazing city. Now teetering on the edge, waiting for a hero to bring it back from the brink.

New Orleans needs Batman because without him, the city will drown in its own blood.

Drip. Drip. Bitches.