Tuesday, August 28, 2007

I would like...

...to punch a baby.

You heard me.

I'm feeling unnecessarily aggressive, angry, and annoyed, and I would like to punch a baby.

I don't see any way to get over this feeling except for to:

a) Destroy something fragile while yelling out some sort of primal scream

b) Hurt someone physically

Why do I feel this way?

I hate it here.

I have one or two moments in my school week in which I do not feel like I am being patronized by teachers or colleagues.

I live in a building with a stupid redneck family with screaming bratty children. The other people in the building are deathly quiet. I have stopped caring if playing music loudly with the bass up will annoy people during the day. If they're pissed off, they can come bug me. Fuck them.

My car is broken down, so even if I managed to make some friends, I can't go see them without asking for a ride or bugging my sister. I also cant drive myself to the gym to weight lift away my anger.

I miss my old life, and my old friends. And yet I know that the likelihood of me ever seeing anyone has dropped exponentially since I moved. I don't have the money, the means, or the time to visit home. And frankly, I'm not really enough of a reason to drive four and a half fucking hours through goddam Indiana on a regular basis. I would say I'll be lucky if I get visitors more than twice a semester

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