Hello Everybody!
So I haven't really taken the time to write much recently because I've been so busy. I just got off of work... after 5am. So that was a nice ten hour day starting at 7 pm. It's a little intense. My job is kind of scary in how professional it is. I feel more driven at this job than I ever did at my desk jobs - the importance of working quickly and efficiently is so high at this job. And it's also a little scary knowing how easily people can get hurt - I fitted a gel frame (something that colors lamps on stage) incorrectly and it dropped down 50 ft narrowly missing the guy who was calling up what light it needed to go into. Now this is not a totally rare occurence, it does happen and you just yell out "heads!" and it's fine. And gel frames are metal pieces that weight probably 2 lbs. But cropping that distance can make pretty much anything dangerous... it's just weird. Not to mention frequently working 50-150 ft above the ground leaning out to try to take pieces off of lights, or whole lights off of railings. It's crazy. And again... to strike the set tonight, we had to work til 5 in the morning, and that was with probably 12 electrics people (what I work) and at least 25 stage crew people (who were in charge of demolishing the set because it was retired after this show).
I still haven't really found my place here. I feel stuck in some sort of limbo between my school world and my work world. I missed the cast party tonight obviously, and I've been trying to find people to hang out with from school, but I still don't have anyone I can just call to come over and hang out for no good reason. On the other hand, I love my work friends, but again, I never feel like I'm really "part of the crowd" enough to ask for phone numbers and such. Maybe that'll change as time goes on. Maybe it'll get worse since I'm not working Susannah (the next opera) or Boheme. Who knows.
Some thoughts on vices: I have all but given up my drinking, smoking and drug use down here. I suppose it's a good thing to save those for special occasions, but I still can't help but feel like I'm not the same anymore. Not because I don't get high, or drunk. But because those things are kind of a symbol of youth and irresponsibility (in a good way) for me now. I've said it a million times, but it's so true that "you can't go home again." I love that phrase because it works for so many different aspects of growing up. As much as I want to cling on to the "glory days" of my undergrad, I truly am becoming an adult now. I have my first major role in an opera, a relatively serious committed job, one degree under my belt working on a second, my own apartment with M.C. Escher prints on the walls and a "study" that houses my desk and piano, and soon to be a guest bed, et cetera, et cetera. That is just so weird to me. My motto has always been "I work hard and I play hard." Nowadays it's more just "I work hard." It's not necessarily a bad thing - I'm enjoying myself, and it feels good to be motivated and make new friends and all, but it's such a different feeling. Being responsible is a lot more of a change than I thought it would be - I was reasonably responsible at MSU, but nowhere near the level I am now. And with good reason - I have every chance in the world to make it big some day. I know I'm good enough. I've been told constantly by people that I have everything going for me as a singer. Especially if I can get into really good shape and just keep working the way I have been, I will probably have a career somewhere. But the closer I get to reaching that goal, the less nights I can take to just be crazy. This is why I like mushrooms (if I can avoid smoking or drinking while on them). It doesn't make any difference in how I am the next day, except that I'm a little braindead - but no sort of hangover or dry/sore throat. Good stuff.
Speaking of which, my young gay Environmental Science major that I've mentioned before on here (although not recently) is going to try to find me some for the Bassnectar concert in exchange for me buying alcohol for him. Yay!
Yes I'm definitely going to see Bassnectar. I'm taking a full weekend to visit Eric and co.in Chicago and going out to bars on Friday and the concert on Saturday. I'm stoked - I have no specific time to be back sunday, so I can really enjoy myself. Interesting fact - only in Michigan do we say "going out to the bar" any time we're going out to any and all bars in the area. Other places say "going to bars." Interesting.
So anyway, I'm going to miss church tomorrow (which is bad but necessary). I feel bad because my schedule's been so off and on for it, but that's what happens when you get busy. I'm sure Dr. P will understand - it's not like I'm hired for it or anything.
Anyway, enough typee. I'm going to fucking bed.
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